Post by Bubba JD on Sept 19, 2010 19:23:27 GMT -6
Scene opens at a public park on a warm, sunny day. Kids are enjoying themselves on the playground equipment. A small basketball court has an intense game going on. On a nearby 18-hole disc golf course, several people are enjoying a game of disc golf. One group, consisting of 7 people, are on Hole 9. One of the players is about to through a disc when a couple of discs come flying at the group from the left hand side of the screen. These discs bean two of the players in the back of the head, sending them down to the ground, screaming in pain. Their buddies quickly check up on them, checking them for injuries.
Some bystanders come in to check on the downed players. Mauler & Mike Hanson wander into the scene, coming from the same direction that the discs had come in from. They look at everyone as though they're losing their minds.
Mauler
FORE!
Mike Hanson
No sleeping on the course, assholes. Some of us would like to play through!
Player 1
Piss off, assholes. You could've hurt these guys pretty bad.
Mike Hanson
Walk it off, pussies. I've stubbed my toe harder then that.....morons.
Mauler & Mike Hanson grab their discs and begin to walk off. Someone from within the group starts cursing the duo out when Hanson throws his disc at him, hitting the guy in the nose hard enough to cause some blood to trickle out of it.
Mike Hanson
Oops. Must've slipped out of my hand.
Hanson goes back, grabs his disc & fakes like he's going to go after a couple people. When they scatter, Hanson walks off laughing. Mauler & Mike continue playing, leaving the group behind.
Mauler
Admit it man. You thought this game was bullshit, didn't you?
Mike Hanson
For once, I'll admit to being wrong. This game is actually pretty awesome. I didn't realize that there could be so much excitment in such a hippie game. How'd you get to be so good at the game, anyway?
Mauler
A cousin taught me the game. He plays on a pro-circuit.
Mike Hanson
They have a pro-circuit?
Mauler
Yeah. The courses are actually pretty challenging. It's actually tougher to play some of these courses then it is to beat the SNW talent.
Mike Hanson
(laughing)
Wiping my ass is tougher then kicking SNW ass. I mean, we're still stuck kicking the crap out of the Imperfect World again. That can't be all that hard, since we've done it more times then I can remmember.
Mauler
It actually means something, this time. We're actually in a contenders match, this week. When we mop the floor with these inbreds this time, we finally get our shot at the Texas Tag Team Titles.
Mike Hanson
Aren't the titles being held by the lesbians?
Mauler
(laughing)
What's your fascination with lesbians?
Mike Hanson
What? I can't help it that they're lesbian.
Mauler
Dude, they aren't lesbian. Rory is a Russian.....
Mike Hanson
Russian women look just like the men.
Mauler
.....Petrina Rotchester is Irish, I think.
Mike Hanson
Irish women drink & smoke worse then the men. I hear they use the same public crappers as the men.
Mauler
You realize that Samu is Canadian.
Mike Hanson
Canadian men have shriveled up ding-dongs. I believe JBL once confused Adam Copeland for a woman in the showers.
Mauler
I'm not about to ask you about Xander Nova.
Mike Hanson
You don't want to know.
Mauler
Getting those title shots should be pretty easy. How hard can it be destroying Soul Reaper or Tyler Guevara?
Mike Hanson
Here's the best comparison for you. Reaper & Guevara are the equivalent of San Francisco. We, on the other hand, would be equal to an earthquake....circa 1906. The destruction will be widespread, affecting every last member of the ImPerfect World.
And, just like FEMA, help will be slow & ineffective.
Mauler
It'll take years for them to recover from the whooping we give them. Long after we've been inducted into the SNW Hall of Fame, Reaper & Guevara will be remembered for being washed up hasbeens who could never fully regain their dignity or self-respect.
From off in the distance, an ambulance can be heard coming into the park, lights & sirens blaring. Mauler & Hanson look over, seeing that the people they had hit with discs are still down.
Mike Hanson
I get the feeling that we'd be smart to leave.
Mauler
Our cars are nearby.
The duo bolt for their car as the scene comes to an end.
Some bystanders come in to check on the downed players. Mauler & Mike Hanson wander into the scene, coming from the same direction that the discs had come in from. They look at everyone as though they're losing their minds.
Mauler
FORE!
Mike Hanson
No sleeping on the course, assholes. Some of us would like to play through!
Player 1
Piss off, assholes. You could've hurt these guys pretty bad.
Mike Hanson
Walk it off, pussies. I've stubbed my toe harder then that.....morons.
Mauler & Mike Hanson grab their discs and begin to walk off. Someone from within the group starts cursing the duo out when Hanson throws his disc at him, hitting the guy in the nose hard enough to cause some blood to trickle out of it.
Mike Hanson
Oops. Must've slipped out of my hand.
Hanson goes back, grabs his disc & fakes like he's going to go after a couple people. When they scatter, Hanson walks off laughing. Mauler & Mike continue playing, leaving the group behind.
Mauler
Admit it man. You thought this game was bullshit, didn't you?
Mike Hanson
For once, I'll admit to being wrong. This game is actually pretty awesome. I didn't realize that there could be so much excitment in such a hippie game. How'd you get to be so good at the game, anyway?
Mauler
A cousin taught me the game. He plays on a pro-circuit.
Mike Hanson
They have a pro-circuit?
Mauler
Yeah. The courses are actually pretty challenging. It's actually tougher to play some of these courses then it is to beat the SNW talent.
Mike Hanson
(laughing)
Wiping my ass is tougher then kicking SNW ass. I mean, we're still stuck kicking the crap out of the Imperfect World again. That can't be all that hard, since we've done it more times then I can remmember.
Mauler
It actually means something, this time. We're actually in a contenders match, this week. When we mop the floor with these inbreds this time, we finally get our shot at the Texas Tag Team Titles.
Mike Hanson
Aren't the titles being held by the lesbians?
Mauler
(laughing)
What's your fascination with lesbians?
Mike Hanson
What? I can't help it that they're lesbian.
Mauler
Dude, they aren't lesbian. Rory is a Russian.....
Mike Hanson
Russian women look just like the men.
Mauler
.....Petrina Rotchester is Irish, I think.
Mike Hanson
Irish women drink & smoke worse then the men. I hear they use the same public crappers as the men.
Mauler
You realize that Samu is Canadian.
Mike Hanson
Canadian men have shriveled up ding-dongs. I believe JBL once confused Adam Copeland for a woman in the showers.
Mauler
I'm not about to ask you about Xander Nova.
Mike Hanson
You don't want to know.
Mauler
Getting those title shots should be pretty easy. How hard can it be destroying Soul Reaper or Tyler Guevara?
Mike Hanson
Here's the best comparison for you. Reaper & Guevara are the equivalent of San Francisco. We, on the other hand, would be equal to an earthquake....circa 1906. The destruction will be widespread, affecting every last member of the ImPerfect World.
And, just like FEMA, help will be slow & ineffective.
Mauler
It'll take years for them to recover from the whooping we give them. Long after we've been inducted into the SNW Hall of Fame, Reaper & Guevara will be remembered for being washed up hasbeens who could never fully regain their dignity or self-respect.
From off in the distance, an ambulance can be heard coming into the park, lights & sirens blaring. Mauler & Hanson look over, seeing that the people they had hit with discs are still down.
Mike Hanson
I get the feeling that we'd be smart to leave.
Mauler
Our cars are nearby.
The duo bolt for their car as the scene comes to an end.
