No Holds Barred- 2/13/09: Denton, TX

[Hollywood]

The old WWF Saturday Night's Main Event short promo music(that ticker sounding music that was used while wrestlers cut brief promos before the show started) is played as the background music as various SNW wrestlers competing tonight on No Holds Barred stand in front of a background made of their logo.



JOHNNY MOXIE
David and Goliath. Jack and the Beanstalk. Omerta, there's a few differences in our match tonight and these stories of big and small. It won't take five smooth stones to take you down, and it won't take me days on end to chop you down to size. All it's going to take is to get you into a New York State Of Mind, then I'll have the Von Erich Memorial Title... Hook, Line and Sinker.



HELLSPAWN
Have any of you pathetic, spoiled souls watching on national television ever had to bear the burden of having to convince your child you're not a monster? Ever since Silvus took the SNW Texas Championship from me in Southlake, Texas on SNW Onslaught, I've had to bear that burden because Silvus had to resort to burning my flesh. Wench can tell you how difficult it is to calm Damien down anytime he sees me without my mask.

WENCH
Silvus, what you did to Hellspawn, you're lucky you're not locked up in Alcatraz. But then what's the fun in that? Hellspawn will make sure you suffer worse than a human being afflicted with AIDs, hepatitis, cancer and leprosy all rolled into one. Which brings me to the SNW Texas Tag Team Title Match tonight. Xtreme Team, Goryokaku is putting the finishing touches on the straps that will keep you two tied together. Isn't it fitting that you end your careers tied to each other, unable to help the other.



RICK ROLL
Tonight on No Holds Barred, I promise not to let any of you down, especially you, Enigmah. I will be going out to that ring tonight because I have something that is most urgent that I can't hold back any longer!



Syco Boy and Dave Mason are standing with their backs to the camera, with Sara Cannady in the middle and in front of them.

SARA CANNADY
Tonight, the show is over. There will be no more Sycotic Cage Matches, no more Syco Bombs or Final Lights. But just because this is the last hurrah for Syco and Dave doesn't mean that it's a foregone conclusion that Wench and Goryokaku will walk out the Texas Tag Team Champions. Wench, you say that Xtreme Team winning the titles to not defend them cheapens the belts? I hardly agree, and over 10,000 fans packing the UNT Coliseum, aka the Super Pit, in Denton, Texas will disagree with you as well.

Syco and Dave turn their heads to shout "WHAT SHE SAID!" The shot then switches to the No Holds Barred intro, a video montage consisting of highlights from the Alley Ratz, Omerta, Johnny Moxie, Sports Nutz, Wench and Goryokaku, Silvus, Hellspawn, Emo Kid, Azrael and Xtreme Team as the theme to the movie "No Holds Barred" plays.

You only learn where you are inside,
when life gives you the test.
Will you back down, turn and run,
or stand up with the best?
When you're back's to the wall, what will your answer be?
Will you run for the door?
Will you run out on me like it's hard?
It's no holds barred!
NO HOLDS BARRED!

Shot switches to inside the UNT Coliseum, also known as the Super Pit, panning around a sold out crowd that is screaming their heads off and showing off their signs such as "XTREME TEAM, SAY IT AIN'T SO!" "I SAW THE ENIGMAHS!" "CRAIG MUELLER'S NOT FAT!" and "GORDIE/GORY IN 2012!"

MARK FOLLOWILL
Live before a sold out crowd in the Super Pit in Denton, Texas, Sports Nutz Wrestling presents No Holds Barred live on FOX!

The camera shot switches to show Mark Followill and Jason Martel standing at the announce table.

MARK FOLLOWILL
I'm Mark Followill, and standing with me is someone who couldn't cut the mustard in the Dark Ones, Jason Martel.

JASON MARTEL
Whoa, whoa, whoa! I was able to cut the mustard in the Dark Ones. I was just dealt an unlucky hand when I got injured, that's all!

MARK FOLLOWILL
Well whatever the case may be, tonight, Friday the 13th, just might be their night.

JASON MARTEL
That's right because Hellspawn has a chance to regain the Texas Championship from Silvus, and Wench and Goryokaku look to retain the Texas Tag Team Titles in a Blooded Strap Ladder Match against Xtreme Team, who will quickly find out that fairy tales are just that. This is one story that won't have a happy ending in my book!

MARK FOLLOWILL
Also tonight, Omerta defends the Von Erich Memorial Title against the undefeated Johnny Moxie.

JASON MARTEL
You say Johnny Moxie's undefeated as if he's been here for quite some time. But he's only had three matches. Now the Von Erich Memorial Title is on the line, and he's taking on the seven foot tall Omerta. Though it is interesting that Omerta hasn't had anything to say about the match this whole time.

MARK FOLLOWILL
Now originally tonight we were set to see Emo Kid take on Azrael in a 10,000 Thumbtacks Submission Match. However, both men were late to a contract signing with Gordon Heath and Goryokaku, so Gordie and Gory have taken that match off the card and are forcing Emo Kid and Azrael to team up against a team making their debut in SNW, Skip and Scotty D, the Alternative Lifestylers.

JASON MARTEL
All I know about Skip and Scotty D is that they seemed to have a crush on you, Mark. Now Emo Kid and Azrael having to team up again? Well, they are 1-0, if that means anything.

MARK FOLLOWILL
And speaking of tag teams, tonight features a tag team match to determine the undisputed #1 contenders to the Texas Tag Team Titles as the Alley Ratz take on the Sports Nutz, where the winners will either get a tag title shot against Wench and Goryokaku, or will take them on in a match for the vacant titles depending on the outcome of tonight's main event.

JASON MARTEL
The Alley Ratz seem to be more serious and determined than they've ever been. They've realized that this is serious business, and while the Sports Nutz may make you laugh, in the ring they are very seriously dangerous.

MARK FOLLOWILL
When we come back, we'll have our opening match as Omerta defends the Von Erich Memorial Title against Johnny Moxie!

ROB SCHNEIDER IS... THE TRANSEXUAL! ONLY ON BETA AND VHS!

[Hollywood]

Mark Followill: Welcome back to No Holds Barred. Right now, Misty Crawford is standing by with Johnny Moxie as he's set to take on Omerta for the Von Erich Memorial Title.

Shot opens backstage, where Misty Crawford is standing by to interview Johnny Moxie.

Misty Crawford: Thank you, Followill. With me right now is Johnny Moxie, undefeated thus far and has already earned the right to face Omerta for the Von Erich Memorial Championship. Moxie, we are down to the eleventh hour. Are you at all nervous about what is now the biggest match for you so far in SNW?

Johnny Moxie: Misty, it's only natural for me to be a little bit nervous. But once I walk through that curtain and realize what's on the line, the nerves will go away faster than Alex Rodriguez's credibility.

Moxie walks away as the camera shot switches back to ringside, with smoke filling the room.

"Whoever appeals to the law of his fellow man is either a fool or a coward.
Whoever cannot take care of himself without that law is both.
For a wounded man says If I live I will kill you.
If I die you are forgiven.
Such as the rule of honor."

[/color]

Strobe lights flicker as "Omerta" by Lamb of God booms over the PA. Omerta, looking very intimidating, comes out wearing denim shorts, and a sleeveless Lamb of God T-Shirt. A few moments later, Enigmah appears behind him. She raises Omerta's hand high into the air as the fans cheer and chant his name and the two make their way to the ring.

Monica Deluca: Ladies and gentlemen the following match is scheduled for one fall and it is for the Von Erich Memorial Championship! Introducing first, the champion, from Jacksonville, Florida and weighing 300 pounds, Omerta!

Enigmah stays by the turnbuckle on the ground and talks to Omerta who is now in the ring and awaiting.

Jason Martel: I wasn’t aware SNW's own little flasher was going to be at ring side.

Mark Followill: Well, I am not going to complain, and they are friends. She has every right to be here and watch his back. After all, Omerta has done very well to keep the title this long, and I’m sure she doesn’t want his winning streak to end.

Jason Martel: You know, I wonder what Rick Roll's big question for Enigmah is. Maybe he's going to ask her if she's natural, know what I mean?

Mark Followill: Oh stop it!

"Balls to the Wall" hits as Johnny Moxie walks out from behind the curtain and pauses after taking a few steps, putting his hands on his hips and looking around at the crowd.

Monica Deluca: And the challenger from Manhattan New York, weighing 215 pounds, Johnny Moxie!

He then starts to walk slowly to the ring, taking the time to slap a few fan's hands and do a bit of trash talking to the camera before reaching the ring and hopping up onto the apron and looking around at the fans again before climbing up a nearby turnbuckle and saying some things to the fans, pointing to himself and nodding to something before hopping down into the ring and doing some last minute stretches via hanging onto the ropes as his music fades.

Jason Martel: Omerta has a major advantage here, weighing 85 pounds more than Johnny. Poor guy.

Johnny walks over to the ring where Enigmah is and makes a motion of pulling his top up. Enigmah smirks and gives him the middle finger and from out of nowhere, Johnny goes down with a bulldog from Omerta. Omerta lets Johnny get to his feet before hitting him with a few upper cuts. Omerta then hits Johnny with two knife edge chops to the chest, but Johnny then sends a boot to the knee of Omerta. He does it again before sending a few punches of his own to Omerta's face. Omerta pushes Johnny away before Irish whipping him into the ropes. On the rebound, Johnny hits Omerta with an elbow to the face. Johnny then backs up some to run at Omerta, but Enigmah grabs his ankle and he trips to the ground.

Jason Martel: Now don't tell me you condone that, Mark.

Mark Followill: No, I don't condone it whatsoever.

The ref shouts to Enigmah, asking if she tripped Johnny, to which she raises her hands and shakes her head no. Johnny gets up and runs at Omerta, spearing him in the waste and backing him up into a turnbuckle. Johnny then jumps up on the turnbuckle and hits Omerta with a huracanrana taking him to the mat. Johnny gets to his feet and hits a springboard moonsault on Omerta before going for the pin. ONE... TWO... Omerta pushes him off.

Mark Followill: Both of these men are doing well and Johnny is trying to tire Omerta.

Jason Martel: Well, I hope he knows what he is doing or this could be bad as Omerta is still a big man.

Both men get back to their feet and Enigmah cheers Omerta on. Omerta goes for a clothesline, but Moxie ducks under. Omerta turns around, and Moxie catches him with a Flatliner. Moxie goes to the corner as Enigmah pounds the mat for Omerta to get up. Omerta back to his feet, but as he turns around, Moxie jumps off the middle turnbuckle and nails him with the New York State of Mind. Moxie picks Omerta up and whips him into the ropes. Omerta rebounds off the ropes, and Moxie catches him, driving Omerta's head down into his knees(like the Codebreaker), nailing Omerta with the Hook, Line and Sinker. Moxie goes for a cover as Enigmah shouts at Omerta to get up. ONE... TWO... THREE!

Jason Martel: Whoa! We've already got a new Von Erich Memorial Champion!

Monica Deluca: Your winner and new Von Erich Memorial Champion, Johnny Moxie!

Mark Followill: Omerta just seemed a bit off tonight.

Jason Martel: And you've gotta think that Janelle won't be too happy about it. Hell, she'll probably dump him now.

Mark Followill: She will not!

Jason Martel: Well maybe not, I don't know. But I do know that up next, the Sports Nutz take on the Alley Ratz, and IP Freely will have a quick word with the Sports Nutz before the match.

Mark Followill: That's next!

EXTREME DOILIES! BECAUSE SEXY AND SASSY DOESN'T HAVE TO BE SISSY! EXTREME DOILIES![/b][/center]

[Hollywood]

Shot opens backstage in front of the No Holds Barred banner where IP Freely is standing by with the Sports Nutz.

IP Freely: Fans, welcome back to No Holds Barred here on FOX, and with me right now are Craig "Senior" Mueller and George Dunpork, the Sports Nutz, along with their manager and co-owner of SNW, "The Excellent Gordie, Gordon Heath. Tonight, you have a chance to be facing your allies at WrestleStock should you defeat the Alley Ratz.

Gordon Heath: Well I can tell you right now that Goryokaku and I have decided that there will be a change of plans. You see, with Onslaught becoming Saturday Night Onslaught, going live and emanating from the Gordietorium in Downtown Fort Worth beginning February 28, we thought that in the best interest of the show that the Sports Nutz, because let's face it the Alley Ratz won't win, will face Wench and Goryokaku for the Texas Tag Team Titles, whether they're for the vacant titles or whether it's Wench and Gory defending the belts. Now...

Out of nowhere, Eddy smashes Gordon Heath with a kendo stick, then hits George Dunpork and Craig Mueller with the kendo stick. They try to fight back, but Twitch comes into the view and smashes them both in the head with a trash can. The Alley Ratz drop the weapons and bring the Sports Nutz out of the camera view with them.

Mark Followill: It looks like the Alley Ratz were serious about being... well... serious.

Jason Martel: Those cowards ambushed the Sports Nutz when they weren't ready! Those punks!

The Alley Ratz and Sports Nutz appear from behind the curtain, brawling with each other, hitting each other with flurries of left and right hand punches. They brawl all the way down to the ring as referee Mike Croft runs down to the ring and doesn't even bother to restore order. He just calls for the bell to start the match. Eddy rolls Craig into the ring. Eddy slides in, but Craig greets him with several stomps to the back. Outside the ring, George nails Twitch with a headbutt, knocking him down, then goes over to his corner.

Jason Martel: It was only a matter of time before the Sports Nutz regained control of this match.

Mark Followill: They have the upper hand right now as Craig has Eddy locked in a Dragon Sleeper.

Eddy fights his way back up as Craig tries to keep the Dragon Sleeper locked in, but Eddy brings him down with a reverse jawbreaker. Craig holds his jaw, then Eddy catches him with a swinging neckbreaker. Eddy makes the tag to Twitch, and Craig makes a tag to George. Twitch nails George with a front dropkick, but it just staggers George. George goes for a clothesline, but Twitch ducks under and runs toward the ropes. He springboards off the ropes, twists around and attempts a crossbody block, but George catches him and nails him with a powerslam in one fluid motion.

OOOOHHHH!

Mark Followill: Dunpork counters with a powerslam! ONE... TWO... and Twitch gets the shoulder up.

Jason Martel: The Sports Nutz are just too big for those midgets, the Alley Ratz.

George picks Twitch up in a military press, and brings him down with a gorilla press slam. George steps on Twitch, walking over him and toward his corner to tag in Craig. Craig picks Twitch up and throws him over with a fallaway slam. Craig picks Twitch up again, underhooks his arms, then nails him with a tiger bomb. ONE... TWO... Eddy breaks up the count, and referee Mike Croft tells him to get back to his corner. Meanwhile, Craig makes a tag to George. They whip Twitch into the ropes and they both nail him with a big boot, lifting their feet up as if they were the Rockettes. Craig runs and rebounds off the ropes and nails a leg drop, then George does the same thing, crushing Twitch with the leg drop.

Mark Followill: George with the pinfall attempt. ONE... TWO... And Eddy runs in to break it up again.

Jason Martel: Even Eddy realizes that the Sports Nutz have their number now. They don't even need Gordon Heath out here.

George spits at Eddy, who runs in as the referee cuts him off. Eddy is yelling over at George as the ref keeps him at bay. Meanwhile, Craig comes into the ring and locks Twitch into the Sharpshooter, then George locks in a Camel Clutch as Twitch screams out in pain.

Mark Followill: The Sports Nutz have Twitch locked up in the Seventh Inning Stretch!

Jason Martel: Take me out to the ball game! Hahaha!

The ref turns around and yells at Craig to get out of the ring. Craig lets go of Twitch's legs as George holds onto the Camel Clutch. As the ref is getting Craig back into his corner, Eddy runs in and nails George in the head with a Shining Wizard, causing George to collapse off of Twitch. Once he's in his corner, Craig turns around and realizes that George is out and yells at him to make a tag. The crowd is stomping their feet, pulling for Twitch to make a tag. George crawls to his corner and makes a tag, but so does Twitch. Craig runs in, but Eddy catches him with a flurry of right hand punches. Craig stops Eddy by poking him in the eyes, which draws loud boos from the crowd. Craig picks Eddy up for a back suplex, but spins him around with a Blue Thunder Driver.

Mark Followill: The Five Minute Major on Eddy! ONE... TWO... Twitch breaks it up!

George charges in for a Quarterback Sack to Twitch, but Twitch leapfrogs over him and George nails Craig with the Quarterback Sack by mistake to a big pop from the crowd. George puts his hands up on his head and panics as Twitch runs to the corner and hops up on the top turnbuckle. George turns around, only to be met by Twitch with a flying missile dropkick from the top turnbuckle as the crowd is going crazy. Eddy gets up and picks Craig up and double underhooks his arms, spins him around and drops him on his face with the Murder Go Round facebuster! Eddy with a cover. ONE... TWO... THREE! "Chicken Huntin" booms over the PA as the crowd roars in approval.

Monica Deluca: Your winners of the match and #1 contenders for the Texas Tag Team Titles, the Alley Ratz!

Jason Martel: The Alley Ratz got lucky, that's all there is to it!

Mark Followill: So now we know that it'll be the Alley Ratz taking on Wench and Goryokaku in two weeks on Saturday Night Onslaught with the Texas Tag Team belts on the line. Stay tuned for more No Holds Barred after this!

GEORGE DUNPORK GRAVY! NOW AVAILABLE IN FAT FREE!

[Hollywood]

"Never Gonna Give You Up" begins to play as Rick Roll is shown walking out to a standing ovation as Enigmah stands by his side. Rick walks out as he reaches along the ramp to slap hands with some of the fans.

Mark Followill: Rick Roll looks to have the crowd behind him here in Denton.

Jason Martel: Rick rolling is the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard in my life.

Mark Followill: As you can see Enigmah is out here with Rick Roll, she was out here earlier with Omerta as well, so seems like you can call her the manager, of this unnamed trio.

Jason Martel: Rick Roll and Omerta are pathetic, but man I’d love to ride Enigmah if you know what I mean.

Mark Followill: That line was uncalled for we try to be family orientated.

Jason Martel: Since when?

Rick Roll continues down the ramp and climbs up on the apron and helps Enigmah in, and then climbs in himself. He goes over and grabs a microphone as his theme dies down. Rick Roll stands in the middle of the ring and goes to speak as the crowd continues to cheer as he pauses and looks around at everyone in the crowd.

Mark Followill: Seems like Rick Roll is a favorite here in Denton.

Jason Martel: Most likely because the Mean Green have been rick rolled for years.

Rick Roll: Thank you all the great people of Denton, Texas, but you see tonight I came out here because I have something to get off my chest, with that Enigmah.

Rick Roll looks at Enigmah and goes to say something but pauses as he shakes his head. Enigmah grabs the mic some and looks at Rick Roll.

Enigmah: You don’t need to be nervous. Just say what you got to say.

Rick Roll looks at Enigmah as a man is shown climbing over the railing near the announcer’s table.

Mark Followill: Is that the mystery guy who keeps sending those messages?

Jason Martel: Its possible, his face is covered so I can’t tell who it is.

Rick Roll goes to speak as the mystery man slides into the ring from behind and hits Rick Roll from behind pushing Rick Roll into Enigmah. The mystery man grabs Enigmah and begins to pull her towards the apron. The man rolls out and lifts Enigmah holding her and climbs back over the railing and begins to head through the crowd.

Mark Followill: That man where is he taking Enigmah? Where is he going?

Jason Martel: The bigger story is what was good ol Rick Roll going to say? We have missed out on a piece of history, oh and Enigmah got kidnapped.

Rick Roll slowly gets back to his feet as he begins to look around, mouthing the word Enigmah, over and over looking very worried.

Jason Martel: Looks like we will never know what Rick Roll was about to waste our time with, and that mystery guy makes an impact by just kidnapping Enigmah, maybe he needed a hot date.

Mark Followill: Oh will you shut up, an innocent girl was kidnapped, give me a break. Well Rick Roll surely looks concerned as would the SNW fans, well more No Holds Barred after this commercial break, what else can happen here tonight.

SNW: BABY ARM MUSIC! ALL OF YOUR FAVORITE SNW THEME SONGS ON CD, AS WELL AS iTUNES!

[/center]

[Hollywood]

Mark Followill: Welcome back to No Holds Barred, live here on FOX, and coming up in just a few moments will be the long awaited rematch between SNW Texas Champion Silvus and former champion Hellspawn for the SNW Texas Championship.

Jason Martel: And Mark, let me tell you something. This match goes back quite a ways, even before these two came to SNW.

Mark Followill: That's right. These two have had quite a storied past, dating back several years. Right now, let's go backstage where Misty Crawford is standing by with the challenger.

Shot switches backstage in front of a plasma screen TV that has the SNW No Holds Barred logo on it, where Misty Crawford is standing by with Hellspawn.

Misty Crawford: Friday the 13th, a day that no doubt sends shivers down the spines of many people throughout the world. But one man who is not afraid of Friday the 13th is the man that is my guest at this time, the first ever and now former SNW Texas Champion, Hellspawn. Tonight, Hellspawn, you have a chance to regain the SNW Texas Championship from your longtime arch nemesis, Silvus.

Hellspawn: Misty, how fitting is it that tonight is Friday the 13th, the Dark Ones' favorite day of the year? The Alley Ratz scoring a fluke win over the Sports Nutz notwithstanding, No Holds Barred is going to be our night. First, I regain the Texas Championship, and later tonight Wench and Goryokaku will show Xtreme Team that not all stories have the fairytale ending. And Soul Reaper, if you even so much as to consider interfering in this match, I will do to you what I should've done a long time ago when we were wrestling up in Canada. Bain breaking Batman's spine will be Candyland compared to what I will do to you.

"White Knuckles" can be heard playing throughout the arena, and Hellspawn walks away from the interview as the shot switches back to the arena, which has been bathed in darkness as the lights have gone out. We hear the majority of the crowd booing, though some cheers can be heard as well.

Mark Followill: This is it. The rematch that Hellspawn has been waiting over three months for as he takes on Silvus for the Texas Championship.

Jason Martel: Don't you just love this eerie feeling of Hellspawn's entrance?

The stage erupts into flames as Hellspawn walks out wearing his black trench coat, the crowd continuing to boo him.

Monica Deluca: The following match is for the SNW Texas Championship! First, from Hell's Kitchen and weighing 355 pounds, representing the Dark Ones, this is Hellspawn!

Mark Followill: The enforcer of the Dark Ones is hellbent on regaining the SNW Texas Championship.

Jason Martel: You know, I'm curious to see what Silvus' face looks like after that fireball Hellspawn threw at him on Guys Night Out back in January at The Bone in Deep Ellum.

Mark Followill: Well from what I understand, the doctor's reports said that Silvus didn't really suffer any serious burns or scars as he was able to turn his head away at just the right angle, though it was enough to temporarily blind him for a few hours. So I can't imagine that Silvus' face will be at all hideous.

Jason Martel: You seriously think it's not hideous as it is without getting burned by a fireball?

Hellspawn walks up the steps and onto the ring apron, steps over the top ropes and walks into the ring as the lights come back on. Hellspawn takes off his black trench coat as "White Knuckles" dies down. The lights dim down as a child's voice can be heard over the P.A. system.

I have killed once before,
So quick and silent and evermore.
The dark enclosure in my mind
Hides my truths more and more.
But once again alas it must open,
So spew fourth the demons that rage,
And hope dear god please just hope,
That ain't Silvus knocking at your door.

[/i]

“Wishmaster” blasts over the P.A. system. The lights go blue, and the crowd cheers with anticipation as Silvus steps out onto the stage. He raises his arm before walking down the ramp tagging a few fans along the way.

Monica Deluca: His opponent hails Manchester, England and weighs 275 pounds. He is the SNW Texas Champion, Silvus!

Mark Followill: He doesn't look that bad to me.

Jason Martel: No, but you know he's got to be thinking in the back of his mind if something worse will happen to him.

Silvus gets to the ring and stops he looks up at his opponent and then smiles before walking to the steps and climbing them up to the ring apron. Ducking through the middle rope he enters the ring and raises his hand to the crowd as they cheer him on. Silvus turns around to make sure Hellspawn doesn't try any shenanigans, then takes his championship belt off and hands it to referee Rick Maynard, who holds the belt up in the air then signals for the bell.

Mark Followill: We don't have to wait any longer for this huge rematch between two of the biggest stars in SNW.

Jason Martel: Hellspawn is hungry and vicious and this time, won't be letting his guard down. And he's right. Silvus has only been getting by in his title defenses. Well Silvus' luck will run out tonight.

Silvus and Hellspawn stare each other down, but not for long as they immediately trade right hand punches. Hellspawn gets the upper hand with a knee to the midsection, followed up with a bodyslam. Hellspawn follows up with a series of stomps, then lands a leg drop on Silvus. Hellspawn goes for an early cover. ONE... Only a one count as Silvus gets the shoulder up. Hellspawn picks Silvus up and whips him into the corner. Hellspawn charges in, but Silvus gets his right boot up, hitting Hellspawn right in the face and staggering him back. Silvus climbs up to the middle turnbuckle, then jumps off of it and hits Hellspawn with a double axe handle smash that sends Hellspawn down to one knee, but Hellspawn is able to pick himself up.

Jason Martel: Silvus couldn't take the big demon down.

Mark Followill: But Hellspawn is out on his feet and doesn't seem to know where he...

Just when you think Hellspawn is out of it, he grabs Silvus by the throat, picks him up and chokeslams him. Hellspawn goes for another cover. ONE... TWO... Silvus kicks out. Before Silvus can get up, Hellspawn grabs a hold of his wrists, places his knee onto Silvus' back and pulls him up, then drives Silvus down facefirst with a Curb Stomp, followed by another Curb Stomp and another. Hellspawn picks Silvus up and drives him down with a Muscle Buster. Hellspawn goes for a pin.

Mark Followill: ONE... TWO... And Hellspawn just pull himself off of Silvus!

Jason Martel: Big mistake by Hellspawn. But then again, I'm not opposed to seeing Silvus get plastered all over the place.

Hellspawn picks Silvus up, but Silvus fights back with a flurry of lefts and rights to Hellspawn's midsection, then follows up with an uppercut that staggers Hellspawn around. Silvus follows up with a dropkick that staggers Hellspawn some more, then finally knocks him down with a dropkick to the chest as the crowd roars in approval.

Mark Followill: Silvus isn't finished just yet!

Jason Martel: Dammit!

Silvus goes to pick up Hellspawn and locks him in a full nelson, lifts him up and slams him down to the canvas with a full nelson slam. Silvus follows up with a Bret Hart-style forearm drop to Hellspawn's face, then goes for a cover. ONE... TWO... Hellspawn kicks out. Hellspawn tries to get up, but Silvus locks him in a Mandible Claw as the crowd goes crazy.

Mark Followill: Mandible Claw! Silvus might win it right here!

Jason Martel: No, no, no!

Hellspawn kicks Silvus in the midsection, breaking free of the Mandible Claw, then takes him down with a DDT. Hellspawn picks Silvus up for a Sitout Tombstone Piledriver, and drives him down with the Hell's Drop. Hellspawn goes for another cover. ONE... TWO... But again, he pulls himself off of Silvus. Hellspawn picks Silvus up, hoists him up in the air and slams him down with a powerbomb but holds on. Hellspawn hoists Silvus up in the air again for a second powerbomb, then repeat for a third powerbomb, transitioned into a Boston Crab!

Mark Followill: Hellspawn's already got Silvus with Hell's Rage!

Jason Martel: Silvus is trying to make it to the ropes, but Hellspawn is too strong and is preventing him from doing so.

Mark Followill: And Silvus taps. Dammit!

The bell rings, and the crowd boos incessantly as Monica Deluca hands the Texas Championship to the referee, who hands it to a gloating Hellspawn. Hellspawn holds the belt up in the air as "White Knuckles" blares over the PA.

Monica Deluca: Your winner, and new SNW Texas Champion, Hellspawn!

Jason Martel: How about that, Mark? Two title matches, and both times we've had a title change.

Mark Followill: Makes you wonder if Wench and Goryokaku are a bit uneasy now about their upcoming Texas Tag Team Title defense against Xtreme Team.

Jason Martel: There's no way the Dark Ones can ever get uneasy, Mark.

Mark Followill: Wait a second, what?.... OK, I just received word in my headset that Gordon Heath and Goryokaku just made a match between Mike Rutherford and Nick Scott, and that match up is next!

YOU'RE HAVING, I'M ARBY'S![/b][/center]

[Hollywood]

The arena goes black as “The Game” by Drowning Pool booms over the PA. When the main beat kicks in, the arena lights come back up and Nick Scott, Anthony Spiccoli following beside him, is standing at the top of the entranceway with his black towel over his head as the fans boo him out of the building, then he begins his walk to the ring.

Monica Deluca: The following contest is set for one fall. First, from Cincinnati, Ohio and weighing 230 pounds, representing Chapter Six and accompanied by Anthony Spiccoli, Nick Scott!

Mark Followill: Just last Saturday night on Guys Night Out, Nick Scott had a big surprise for the Destruction Crew as Sean O'Brien and the Williams Brothers jumped Killer Kong and Super Vader.

We see the video highlights of Chapter Six nailing Killer Kong and Super Vader with chairshots, followed by Mauler and Mike Hanson running into the ring and chasing Chapter Six out.

Jason Martel: Well thank goodness we have some upstanding citizens such as Chapter Six who will stop those bullies, the Destruction Crew.

Nick Scott enters the ring and walks toward one of the corners. He raises his fists in the air as the fans continue to boo him. He takes the black towel off his head and acts like he's going to throw it to the crowd, but instead hands it to Anthony Spiccoli, who laughs about Nick's shenanigans as "The Game" fades out. "My Hero" by the Foo Fighters booms over the PA, and the crowd boos again as Mike Rutherford walks out from behind the entranceway, taunting the fans on his way to the ring.

Monica Deluca: His opponent, from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania and weighing 220 pounds, Mike Rutherford!

Mark Followill: No fan favorite here in this matchup.

Jason Martel: These sickos are probably cheering for them to kill each other.

Rutherford slides into the ring and walks toward one of the corners, climbing to the second turnbuckle and facing the audience. He taunts the crowd as they boo him. "My Hero" fades out and referee Danny Travers calls for the bell. Rutherford and Scott lock up to start the match. They jockey for position, but Scott gains the upper hand with a side headlock, but Rutherford counters with a back suplex. Rutherford shoots back up and takes a bow as the crowd mercilessly boos him.

PHILLY SUCKS! PHILLY SUCKS! PHILLY SUCKS! PHILLY SUCKS!

Rutherford is appalled by the "Philly sucks!" chant and yells at the crowd. Meanwhile, Nick Scott has gotten back up. Rutherford turns around, and Scott grabs him and brings him up and over with a T-Bone suplex. Scott goes for an early cover. ONE... TWO... Rutherford kicks out. Scott picks Rutherford up, locks him in a modified bearhug and puts his head under Rutherford's arms. Scott brings Rutherford up and over with a Northern Lights Suplex pin. ONE... TWO... Rutherford kicks out. Scott gets up and goes to pick up Rutherford, but Rutherford takes him down with a side leg trip takedown. Scott gets back up, but doesn't get a chance to turn around as Rutherford runs to the ropes, rebounds and nails Scott with a bulldog.

Mark Followill: Rutherford with a cover. ONE... TWO... And Nick Scott kicks out.

Jason Martel: It's hard to believe that Mike Rutherford is the same guy who tapped out to Cerise Richardson last month on Guys Night Out. If that's not proof that it was a fluke, I don't know what is.

Rutherford picks Scott up and whips him into the ropes. Rutherford goes for a dropkick, but Scott holds onto the ropes as Rutherford falls on his face. As Rutherford picks himself up and turns himself around, Scott bounces off the ropes, performs a hedgehog roll and nails Rutherford with a Rolling Thunder Clothesline right when Rutherford turns around. Scott doesn't give Rutherford a chance to get up as he sits on top of him and nails him with several mounted punches.

Mark Followill: Nick Scott punching away at Mike Rutherford, and Rutherford escapes with an eye gouge.

Jason Martel: Mike Rutherford shows why he's one of the smartest wrestlers in all of SNW.

Rutherford grabs Scott in a front facelock, but Scott nails Rutherford with a knee to a midsection, then follows up with a Tazplex. Scott immediately follows that up with an arm triangle choke on Rutherford, but Rutherford quickly makes it to the ropes, his feet wrapped around the ropes as referee Danny Travers instructs Scott to let go. Scott holds on, then finally lets go when the ref's count reaches four. Scott goes to pick Rutherford up, but Rutherford rolls him up in a small package. ONE... TWO... Scott kicks out. Scott gets back up, but so does Rutherford, who nails Scott out of nowhere with an STO. Rutherford with another pinfall attempt. ONE... TWO... THR-NO! Scott gets his shoulder up.

Mark Followill: Mike Rutherford so close yet so far on those two near falls. Rutherford now goes to lock in a figure four, but Scott rolls him up! ONE... TWO... And Rutherford barely kicks out.

Jason Martel: Two great ring warriors putting on the match of their lives, and these fans boo them out of the building?!

Rutherford gets back up, but Scott is back up and nails Rutherford with a snap suplex. Scott locks in a Dragon Sleeper on Rutherford, who's in the middle of the ring. Next thing you know, Mauler, Mike "Beastman" Hanson, Super Vader and Killer Kong are making their way down the ramp to the ring as the crowd is cheering their heads off.

Jason Martel: Now what business do the Destruction Crew have being out here?!

Mark Followill: I'm sure they just want to watch the match, Jason.

Scott gets distracted and lets go of the Dragon Sleeper. He turns his attention to the Destruction Crew, yelling at them to leave the building. Sean O'Brien and the Williams Brothers run down the ramp and jump the Destruction Crew, and next thing you know we have a three against four free for all as the crowd goes crazy and fists are flying among all seven men. SNW officials and preliminary wrestlers, as well as the Sports Nutz, all run down to get Chapter Six and Destruction Crew separated and force them to the back. Scott turns around, and Rutherford picks him up in a Flapjack and brings him down throatfirst onto the top rope with the Black Plague. Rutherford goes for the cover. ONE... TWO... THREE!

Monica Deluca: Your winner of the match, Mike Rutheford!

Mark Followill: Well thanks to the distraction of the brawl between the Destruction Crew and Chapter Six, Mike Rutherford picks up the win over Nick Scott.

Jason Martel: They're all the way in the back, and they're still brawling! Nobody can keep them apart!

Mark Followill: We'll be back, and hopefully SNW officials can get everything settled down.

THE EMERGENCY BRAKE OF THE WEEK! EVERY FRIDAY MORNING AT 7:50 CENTRAL TIME ON SPORTSRADIO 1310 THE TICKET! YOU CAN STREAM THE TICKET LIVE AT WWW.THETICKET.COM

[Hollywood]

"Keep Your Hands Off My Girl" starts to play and Skip and Scotty D of the Alternative Lifestylers walk out onto the ramp, waving and cheering at the fans, who don't seem to really care, before high-fiving each other and walking down the ramp, Bushwhackers-style, causing the fans to laugh.

Monica Deluca: Ladies and gentlemen the following match is a tag team match scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from Reverchon Park in the Oak Lawn area of Dallas, Texas and weighing in at a combined weight of 375 pounds, the Alternative Lifestylers!

Skip and Scotty D get into the ring and stare at Monica with glee as their music fades. The cover version of "Careless Whisper" by Ten Masked Men starts to play for a few moments before being replaced by "Redeemer" and both Emo Kid and Azrael walk down the ramp, arguing with each other. Emo has tears in his eyes as Azrael shouts at him.

Monica Deluca: And their opponents, at a combined weight of 405 pounds, Emo Kid and Azrael!

Jason Martel: Ha-ha awesome! They can’t make up their minds whose music to use. This is going to be a fun match!

Mark Followill: I just hope they can get along well enough to try and win this match, which may I add should be a breeze for both of these men.

Emo and Azrael get into the ring and it is Emo who gets in the ring first and Scotty D gets in also. Emo runs at Scotty, who ducks and turns around to quickly DDT Emo kid. Skip cheers as Emo kid gets up and is met with a knee to the gut before Scotty Irish whips him into the ropes. Azrael tags himself in and taunts Emo Kid. Azrael turns around and is met with a standing drop kick to the chest by Scotty D as Skip gets up on the turnbuckle. As Scotty baits Azrael to the other side of the ring, Azrael as his back to Skip. Skip jumps on the back of Azrael wraps his arms around Azrael's throat, choking him. Azrael tries to get him off but Skip refuses to let go until the ref tells him to. Emo Kid laughs at Azrael.

Mark Followill: These are guys are genius! I love them! The under dogs are owning the big names. This seems so wrong.

Jason Martel: That’s because it IS wrong! But hey pure entertainment and that’s what these fans want.

Azrael walks over to Emo Kid and pushes him off the ring. The ref starts to count ONE…TWO…THREE…FOUR! Azrael asks why he is counting and the ref explains that he made a tag to Emo, who has now re-entered the ring. Azrael throws his arms in the air and gets out of the ring but Emo tags him back in. Azrael gets in the ring and both Scotty and Skip are in the ring deciding who will stay in. Azrael runs at them to double clothesline them, but they both duck it and turn around before hitting Azrael with a double DDT, knocking him out. Emo manages to get in the ring enough to tag himself in. As he does, Scotty and Skip double kick him in the stomach and hit him with a double Stunner. Scotty then goes for the pin and Skip slides out of the ring.

Mark Followill: ONE..TWO…THREE! Unbelievable, they pulled it off!

Monica Deluca: Ladies and gentlemen, the winners of this match, the Alternative Lifestylers!

"Keep Your Hands Off My Girl" starts to play and Scotty and Skip raise there arms and cheer.

Jason Martel: Weird. Just weird.

Shot switches to the backstage hallway. Goryokaku and Wench, with cold glares in their eyes and holding their respective Texas Tag Team Championship belts, are walking down the hallway. Luna Vachon tries to get a last second interview with them. She can't even get in a word edgewise as Wench shouts "OUT OF OUR WAY, BITCH!" grabs Luna by her hair and throws her down to the floor, then she and Gory walk on as if nothing happened. The camera shot then switches to the Xtreme Team locker room, where Dave Mason, Syco Boy and Sara Cannady are ready to walk out to the ring. Standing with them is Brenda Price.

Brenda Price: The time for talk is over is an understatement. Tonight, one of the greatest tag teams in all of professional wrestling is calling it a career as Xtreme Team laces it up on last time in a Blooded Strap Ladder Match for the SNW Texas Tag Team Championships. If you three don't mind, please share your final thoughts of your careers in wrestling.

Sara Cannady: I can't believe this is really it. It seems just like yesterday when we were in FCW, feuding with the men who this wrestling promotion was named after.

Dave Mason: And tonight, I can't think of a better way to end our careers then to win the same straps that have been held by some of the greatest names in our sport, such as the Blackjacks, Jose Lothario, Rocky Johnson, Kevin Von Erich, David Von Erich, Kerry Von Erich, Jimmy Snuka, Gino Hernandez, the Samoan Swat Team, Steve and Shaun Simpson, to name a few.

Syco Boy: All of those legendary names, they have us make think... they make us thinking...

Dave, Sara and Brenda are trying not to laugh as Syco is stammering over his final promo.

Syco Boy: They have us.... DADGUMMIT!

Syco Boy storms out of the locker room. Dave peeks around, looks to the camera and says...

Dave Mason: Um... You're having, I'm Arby's.

Dave winks at the camera, then he, Sara and Brenda bust out laughing as the show fades to commercial.

SNW IT'S CHRISTMAS DAMMIT! NOW AVAILABLE ON DVD AND BLURAY!

[Hollywood]

Camera pans around ringside, where we see ladders laid out beside the security railings. Referee Rick Maynard is in the ring, holding the leather straps that will tie both tag teams together, and Monica Deluca is in the ring.

Mark Followill: It's now time for the main event here on No Holds Barred. The Blooded Strap Ladder Match where Goryokaku and Wench will defend the SNW Texas Tag Team Championships against Syco Boy and Dave Mason, Xtreme Team, in what will be Xtreme Team's final match. As a bit of a history lesson, let's take you back to December 19, 2008, SNW It's Christmas Dammit.

Wench picks Syco up and goes for a powerbomb, but he counters with a huracanrana into a pin. ONE... TWO... THR-NO! Wench barely kicks out. Syco is up and staggers back, making a tag to Dave. Dave and Syco pick Wench and attempt a Double Goldcutter, but they're stopped by Gory, who runs in and knocks them down facefirst to the canvas with a double running clothesline to the back of their heads. Syco back up, but Gory catches him with a flurry of martial arts kicks.

Mark Bishop: The Okaku Convention on Syco, and Syco is knocked out through the ropes and to the floor from that Gory Kick!

Jason Martel: But Dave just nailed Gory with the Goldcutter!

Mark Bishop: Dave is trying to cover Gory, but the referee is telling him that Gory isn't the legal man.

Harry Sachs: One minute left in the match! One minute!

As Dave was covering Gory, Wench climbed to the top turnbuckle. As the ref tells Dave that the pin isn't counting because Gory's not the legal man, Wench comes flying off the top rope with a Swanton Bomb onto Dave, knocking him off of Gory and knocking him out, and Wench is a bit slow to get up as well. Wench finally wills herself over to pin Dave. ONE... TWO... Dave kicks out. Wench goes to pick Dave up, but out of nowhere nails the Goldcutter!

Harry Sachs: TEN... NINE... EIGHT... SEVEN... SIX... FIVE... FOUR...

Mark Bishop: Dave is rolling himself over...

Harry Sachs: THREE... TWO...

Mark Bishop: ONE... TWO... And the bell rings!

Jason Martel: Too little too late for Dave Mason.

The ref pats Dave on the back to get him off of Wench, and he's celebrating at first. Sara is jumping up and down and runs over to grab the SNW Texas Tag Team Championships. She helps Syco up, rolling him into the ring. Before she can hand the belts to Dave and Syco, Tanya grabs them from her to give back to Wench and Gory, who are on their knees in the ring. The referee is talking things over with Sara and Xtreme Team, and they're disappointed with what they hear. The ref goes over to Harry Sachs and gives him the details of the result of the match.

Harry Sachs: Ladies and gentlemen, the time limit has expired, and the referee rules this match a draw!

The crowd boos the decision.

Harry Sachs: Therefore, still SNW Texas Tag Team Champions... Wench and Goryokaku of the Dark Ones!

Xtreme Team extend their hands to Wench and Gory, but they refuse to shake their hands and just duck out through the ropes and walk towards the back. They look up at Xtreme Team and hold their belts up, taunting Xtreme Team as the crowd boos them for their total lack of respect.

Mark Followill: Here we are, two months later, and this time there must be a winner. Let's go to Monica Deluca for the ring introductions.

Monica Deluca: The following is a Blooded Strap Ladder Match for the SNW Texas Tag Team Championships. The match will begin with the respective teammates of both teams strapped together. The only way a team can be freed of their strap is to make one of their opponents bleed. The only way to win the match is to climb the ladder, grab both SNW Texas Tag Team belts and retain possession of the belts, and the tag teams can climb the ladder at any time, even if they're strapped together.

"Always" by Saliva blasts throughout the arena as the crowd goes into a frenzy. Syco Boy and Dave Mason are seen walking through the crowd, Sara Cannady following behind them. They hop over the security railing and enter the ring. All three of them climb to the middle turnbuckles and mug for the fans, who are still going crazy. They hop down off the turnbuckles as "Always" dies down. Phil Soussen's cover version of "Welcome To My Nightmare" booms over the PA, and the crowd immediately boos as the lights dim down. Red lights luminate the arena as Goryokaku and Wench, their tag team straps around their waist, along with Tanya Adams, walk out in front of the entranceway, the crowd still booing them. Ignoring the boos of the fans, Goryokaku, Wench and Tanya continue their way down the ramp. Gory stops, holding his hands in a prayer as Wench and Tanya continue their walk down the ramp. Wench and Tanya walk up the steps and onto the ring apron, holding the ropes open for Gory, who lifts head up and has finished his "prayer." He walks up the steps and walks through the ropes. Gory snaps his fingers, and the lights come back on. Gory and Wench then hand the Texas Tag Team belts over to referee Rick Maynard as "Welcome To My Nightmare" dies down.

Monica Deluca: Ladies and gentlemen, introducing first, accompanied by Sara Cannady... Syco Boy and Dave Mason, Xtreme Team!

Mark Followill: The roof just might fly off the top of the Super Pit!

Jason Martel: Personally I wish it would cave in, only crushing Xtreme Team.

Mark Followill: Oh come on!

Monica Deluca: Their opponents, accompanied by Tanya Adams... the reigning SNW Texas Tag Team Champions, representing the Dark Ones... Wench and Goryokaku!

The cheers quickly turn into boos, but Wench and Gory don't give a damn. Xtreme Team talks things over with Sara, and she nods her head. She heads out of the ring and walks through the crowd to leave the ringside area. Gory nods to Tanya, and she exits the ring, walking to the back.

Mark Followill: Looks like we'll get a fair fight here.

Jason Martel: Are you trying to insinuate that Xtreme Team doesn't fight fair?!

Mark Followill: I never said that!

Jason Martel: Damn, you slandering them after how nice they've been to you, and during their last match no less!

Mark Followill: Good lord, what's the matter with you, Jason? Putting words in my mouth.

The apparatus is lowered, and the referee wraps the belts around it, then it's lifted up, suspending the belts up in the air. The ref then takes the straps, and ties Xtreme Team together first. Afterward, he ties Wench and Goryokaku together. The bell sounds, and the match is underway as Wench and Gory stare down Xtreme Team. The crowd is abuzz with excitement, not dying down one bit. Wench is across from Syco, and Gory across from Dave. All four start off with a vengeance, blasting each other with a flurry of right hand punches in an attempt to open each other up. Dave Mason grabs a hold of the strap and pulls on it, causing Syco to fly halfway across the ring and knock Gory down with a flying forearm. Wench tries to help Gory up, but Dave and Syco grab her and bring her down with a double vertical suplex. Syco and Dave decide to go ahead and go for one of the ladders outside the ring. They go outside and grab one of the ladders, but Gory is back up, and so is Wench. Xtreme Team puts the ladder up on the ring apron, but Gory grabs a hold of his team's strap and pulls it, causing Wench to fly into the air and upon landing, nail a baseball slide dropkick onton the ladder, knocking the ladder into both Syco's and Dave's faces, knocking Xtreme Team down.

OOOOHHHH!

Jason Martel: Wench might have just drawn first blood on Xtreme Team.

Mark Followill: If either Syco Boy or Dave Mason are bleeding, then Wench and Gory will be freed of their strap.

The ref, who's already standing by outside the ring, goes to check on both members of Xtreme Team. Dave Mason isn't bleeding, but Syco has a cut on his forehead. The referee gets back into the ring and tells Gory and Wench that they are freed from their strap. They take their strap off, and Gory decides to hold onto it to use it as a weapon. Dave attempts to get back into the ring, but Wench has grabbed the ladder and attempts to hit Dave in the head with it, but Dave grabs it just in time and pushes Wench off of it. Syco is back up and rolls into the ring as both he and Dave are still tied together. Gory braces himself to counter Xtreme Team as they have the ladder. They line it up and charge at Gory, but he rolls under them, ducking the ladder. They turn around, still holding the ladder, and Gory nails the Gory Kick onto the end of the ladder that Syco is holding, knocking him down. Gory grabs that end of the ladder, and now it's a tug-of-war between him and Dave Mason over the ladder. Wench is back up, and nails Dave with a low blow.

Mark Followill: Wench venturing off into SOUTH Carolina with that shot.

Jason Martel: Hey, anything goes in this match, hell this whole show! It is No Holds Barred, after all.

Gory proceeds to pick up the ladder and set it up in the middle of the ring. But before either one of them can climb the ladder, both Syco and Dave nail stereo dropkicks on Gory and Wench respectively, knocking them down. Syco goes to the outside and looks under the ring and finds a steel chair. Syco re-enters the ring just as Gory is getting back up. Syco swings the chair and nails Gory in the head, busting him wide open, and the ref allows Xtreme Team to get free. Just as they're free, Wench takes Dave down with a huracanrana. Syco attempts to nail Wench with the chair, but Wench rolls and ducks under the swing. Syco turns around, and Wench superkicks the chair right into Syco's face, causing him to fall down as he drops the chair.

Mark Followill: Syco Boy is now wearing the infamous crimson mask.

Jason Martel: This match might not last much longer if these four keep tearing each other like this.

Wench goes to help Gory up, but Dave grabs her and slams her down with a release German suplex. Dave gets back up, but right when he turns around, Gory blasts him with a spinning roundhouse kick. Syco staggers back up, but Gory nails him with a side Back Breaker. Gory resets the ladder as Wench is getting back up. They nod to each other, and proceed to begin climbing the ladder.

Jason Martel: Here we go, the end of Xtreme Team! Syco Boy, Dave Mason, we hardly knew you!

Mark Followill: Wait a second, Jason. It looks like there's still life in Dave and Syco.

Gory and Wench are almost to the top, but Dave and Syco are back up and they push the ladder over, causing Gory and Wench to fly off of it and fall into the ropes, bounce off and fly backward, falling backfirst onto the canvas as the ladder collapses on top of the ropes. Dave and Syco grab the ladder and place it in the middle of the ring, setting it up as Gory and Wench struggle to get themselves back up. As Dave and Syco take the first steps onto the ladder, Gory and Wench both find the abandoned straps and go to pick them up. Dave and Syco are halfway up their respective sides of the ladder when Gory whips Dave across the back with his strap, and Wench whips Syco across the back with her strap, stopping both Dave and Syco. Gory goes under Dave, and Wench climbs up the ladder and gets behind Syco. Gory powerbombs Dave off the ladder onto the canvas, while Wench nails Syco with a Russian Leg Sweep off the ladder.

OOOOHHHH!

Knowing that Xtreme Team's not finished, Gory picks Dave up and throws him outside the ring, while Wench picks herself up and throws Syco out of the ring. Gory follows out after Dave on one side of the outside, while Wench follows Syco out on the other side.

Mark Followill: The Dark Ones looking to finish off Xtreme Team once and for all.

Jason Martel: This is smart thinking on their part. In order to be able to climb the ladder and retrieve the belts, they have to make sure that both Syco Boy and Dave Mason are out of commission.

Gory picks Dave up and attempts to whip him into the ring steps, but Dave reverses the whip, sending Gory backfirst into the steps. Wench goes to suplex Syco, but Syco blocks it and counters with a snap suplex onto the floor. Dave follows in on Gory, grabbing him by the head and blasting away at him with right hand punches, then stops to grab Gory by the head as he climbs on top of the security railing. Dave hops off the security railing, spins around and nails Gory with a Tornado DDT onto the floor. Syco, meanwhile, picks Wench up and slams her down with a side Belly to Belly Suplex to the floor. Syco picks Wench up by the head and attempts to slam her head into the ring apron, but she blocks it, and counters by slamming Syco into the apron, then rolls him in. Outside the ring, Dave picks up Gory, but Gory nails him with a thrust to the throat, causing Dave to grab a hold of his windpipe. Gory nails Dave in the back of the head with a karate kick, knocking Dave down facefirst onto the floor. Wench decides to grab one of the other ladders outside the ring for the hell of it and brings it in. She leans that ladder up like a ramp onto the ladder that's been set up. Gory instructs Wench to keep Syco at bay as he goes to climb the ladder.

Mark Followill: Goryokaku climbing the ladder now as Wench tries to keep Syco Boy at bay, but not for long as Syco just nailed Wench with a jawbreaker!

Jason Martel: And Syco follows that up with a DDT!

Gory is close to the top of the ladder and is within reach of the tag team belts. He just needs to climb one more rung, but he doesn't see Syco has regrouped. Syco looks up, does a quick Hail Mary, then sprints up the second ladder that's leaning like a ramp, jumps and nails Gory in the head with a Shining Wizard, sending Gory flying off the ladder and falling onto the ropes, flipping over to the outside as Syco falls onto the ropes as well, but bounces backward and falls on his back on the canvas.

HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T!

Bodies are lying down everywhere.

Jason Martel: It looks like a frat party gone awry!

Mark Followill: Fans, we have to take a time out. If anybody somehow gets back up and climbs the ladder to get the belts, we'll show you what happened!

CHORK! A LITTLE BIT BEEF, A LITTLE BIT CHICKEN. CHORK!

[Hollywood]

Mark Followill: Welcome back to No Holds Barred, and during the break, all of the referees employed in SNW came to check on Xtreme Team and the Dark Ones.

Jason Martel: Then when Goryokaku was helped up, he proceeded to Gory Kick one of the referees, and the others got away as fast as they could.

Mark Followill: Back to live action now, and Gory has set a ladder up in the middle of the ring.

Gory is about to climb the ladder, but Syco is back up and gets him off the ladder. Syco nails Gory with a flurry of forearm shots, but Gory ducks the last forearm shot, turns Syco around and hits him with a Northern Lights Suplex, transitioned into a Tazmission. Dave is back up and kicks at Gory's head, forcing him to let go of the Tazmission. Dave backs up, runs at Gory and Catcus Clotheslines him over the ropes, sending both guys to the floor outside the ring. Dave and Gory pick themselves up and exchange right hand punches, not giving them anytime to see Syco getting back up. Syco runs and springboards off the ropes, does a Shooting Star press and lands the Syco Star on Gory and Dave, sending all three men to the floor as the crowd cheers on. While all three men are struggling to get up, Wench is setting up the ladder, but close to the ropes instead of in the middle of the ring.

Mark Followill: What in the world does Wench have in mind here?

Jason Martel: Can't be anything good if she's setting it up close to the ropes.

Mark Followill: She's not planning on jumping in the air and hoping to grab both belts that way, is she?

Wench climbs the ladder as Gory, Dave and Syco struggle to their feet. Wench climbs all the way to the top of the ladder, holding her balance. When all three men are up outside the ring, she flies off the top of the ladder and crashes onto Gory, Dave and Syco with a Swanton Bomb!

HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T!"

Mark Followill: Good god almighty! Wench may have just killed herself taking out everyone else with that Swanton off the ladder!

Jason Martel: Everybody is down and out again, but I don't think the referees will want to check on them this time considering what Gory did earlier.

Gory is the first one to start stirring as he struggles to get up. Dave and Syco are beginning to stir as well. Syco helps himself up and rolls into the ring, but is lying down, trying to catch his breath. Dave tries to get up, but Gory hits him with a reverse DDT. Gory then crawls over to Wench in an effort to revive her. Meanwhile, Syco picks himself back up and grabs the ladder, dragging it to the middle of the ring. Syco sets the ladder up and begins is slow ascent up the ladder, as this match has taken a lot out of him, blood all over his face. Gory gets up and rolls into the ring right as Syco has made his way to the top of the ladder. Gory and Syco exchange right hand punches, but Gory gets the better of Syco with a swinging neckbreaker off the ladder and to the canvas, knocking both men out. Dave rolls into the ring and decides to try his hand at climbing the ladder. Meanwhile, outside the ring, Wench is looking under the ring and finds a steel chair. Dave is halfway up the ladder when Wench runs in and smashes him in the back with the steel chair, then powerbombs him off the ladder and to the canvas. Instead of climbing the ladder, Wench decides to nail Dave over the back with the chair over and over again. Wench then screams at Dave to get his ass up.

Mark Followill: Dave is struggling to his knees... and Wench just destroyed the chair over Dave Mason's head!

OOOOHHHH!

Dave is out on his knees, the chair wrapped around his head. Wench finishes the job with a Tajiri-like Buzzsaw Kick to Dave's head, knocking him down and seemingly out. Dave is now busted wide open. Wench turns around, and Syco kicks her in the midsection, then follows up with a Syco Clash, knocking her out. Gory is back up and charges after Syco, but Syco nails him with a Superkick, blood flying off of Gory's head as he falls down and out. Syco collapses to the mat, and again, all four participants are down.

Jason Martel: Syco Boy just stole Goryokaku's Gory Kick!

Mark Followill: Well some might contend that Goryokaku stole someone else's Sweet Chin Music.

Jason Martel: Now the question is can anybody get up?

Mark Followill: Well hopefully they will. Meanwhile, we have to take our final timeout!

SNW PRESENTS THE SPORTYS! LIVE ON THE CW NETWORK, SATURDAY NIGHT, MARCH 28 AT 8 PM CENTRAL TIME!

[Hollywood]

Mark Followill: Welcome back to No Holds Barred, and we're going to stay with the rest of this match, even if we run over our originally scheduled airtime, as FOX has been gracious to allow us an overrun in the event that this match goes longer than expected.

Jason Martel: It just might as we see Dave Mason just now getting up to his feet.

Dave is back up, but so is Wench. Wench goes for a right hand punch, but Dave blocks it, then nails her with a clothesline. Dave picks Wench up and whips her into the corner, then follows in and sets her upside down on the turnbuckles in the Tree of Woe position. Dave picks up the other ladder that's lying around, runs and nails a sliding dropkick into the ladder that smashes Wench's face!

OOOOHHHH!

Wench crumbles down to the mat off the turnbuckles, and now she's busted wide open. Meanwhile, Gory has picked up the other ladder and rams the top end of it into Dave's head, knocking him down and out of the ring. As Gory drives the end of the ladder into Dave's midsection, Syco is picking himself back up. Syco looks over his shoulder to see when Gory is about to turn around. As Gory is turning around, Syco runs and jumps up in the air onto the top turnbuckle, jumps off of it and nails a Whisper in the Wind onto the ladder, nailing Gory with the ladder as both men go down to the mat.

OOOOHHHH!

Syco picks himself back up and grabs Gory by the head, then whips him hard into the corner, sending Gory down on his bum in the corner. Syco sets the ladder up in front of Gory, then goes to the turnbuckle on the opposite side, facing Gory as the crowd is abuzz with excitement.

Mark Followill: What is Syco Boy thinking? He's on the other side of the ring!

Jason Martel: They don't call him Syco Boy because he thinks clearly, you know.

Syco climbs to the top, plays to the crowd, then flies all the way to the other side, nailing the Flying Syco, smashing Gory in the face with the ladder in the process.

HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T!

Both Syco and Gory are down and out. Dave has gotten back up outside the ring and has gone underneath to find a table. He picks it up and slides it into the ring. Dave looks under the ring for more furniture, and happens to find a bunch of flourescent light tubes and slides them into the ring as the crowd lets out a deafening roar. But right when Dave slides into the ring, Wench grabs one of the light tubes and smashes it over Dave's head, and you can hear the light tube pop as it shatters over Dave's already bleeding head as the crowd gasps in horror. Wench then takes what's left of the broken light tube and digs the sharp, broken end into Dave's forehead as he screams out in pain. But then Dave finds the wherewithal to grab a light tube and while still sitting down, swings it backward, smashing Wench over the head as she goes down to the canvas.

Mark Followill: These four are willing to do anything to be called SNW Texas Tag Team Champions!

Jason Martel: This has to be the most brutal match ever shown on network television.

Dave gets back to his feet, but Gory is back up and catches him with a flurry of kicks that he calls the Okaku Convention, then nails him with the Gory Kick, sending Dave down to the mat. Gory sees the table and the light tubes, and a big grin comes over his face. He picks up the table and sets it up, then places the light tubes on top of the table. Gory makes sure that the ladder is set up just right, then picks Dave up and drags him over to the ladder. Gory gets on one side, but holds on to Dave, who's on the opposite side of the ladder, by the head and brings him up the ladder with him. Gory puts Dave in a front facelock, but Dave blocks the move that Gory attempts. Dave punches away at Gory's head, freeing him from the front facelock. Dave then places Gory in a front facelock, jumps off the ladder holding onto Gory and crashes through the tables and light tubes with the DKO!

HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T!

Both men are seemingly unconscious as they lie down in the heap of broken table pieces and shattered glass from the broken light tubes. Wench picks herself up, as does Syco Boy. Wench goes in for a Twist of Fate on Syco, but Syco counters with a Syco Drop, knocking Wench out. Syco then proceeds to begin his ascent up the ladder. Dave is stirring about, trying to come back to life. Syco is close to the top of the ladder, and Dave crawls over with what little he has left toward the ladder and places his hand on one of the lower rungs of the ladder. Dave forces himself slowly up the ladder as Syco grabs one of the belts, then sees his brother climbing the ladder. Syco cheers Dave on as Dave climbs up to the top, then grabs the other belt as the crowd lets out a deafening roar as "Always" blares over the PA and the bell rings!

Jason Martel: NO! NO! NO! This isn't supposed to happen!

Mark Followill: The fans are blowing the roof off the Super Pit! I don't even know if I can hear myself think!

Jason Martel: HUH?!

Mark Followill: I said I can't hear myself think!

Jason Martel: How can you hear someone stink?

Mark Followill: THINK! You idiot! THINK! Not stink!

Monica Deluca: Your winners, and new SNW Texas Tag Team Champions, Syco Boy and Dave Mason, Xtreme Team!

Dave and Syco use what little they have left in the tank to hold the belts up in the air as the crowd goes insane. Meanwhile, SNW officials run down to help Wench and Gory, who are completely out of it, to the back. Sara Cannady runs down to the ring as Dave and Syco climb down the ladder. Sara runs up to Syco and grabs him by the head and gives him the biggest kiss she can, tongue and all. Dave, Syco and Sara then all share a group hug, and it's obvious that Sara doesn't give a damn that their blood has gotten all over her.

Mark Followill: This is a hallmark moment in SNW for sure!

Jason Martel: What are you talking about?! This is a black day in the history of this great company!

Omerta, dressed in jeans and an SNW T-shirt, makes his way down the ramp and slides into the ring, giving congratulatory hugs to all three members of Xtreme Team. Rick Roll, who's still smarting a bit from his beatdown from the masked man, hobbles down the ramp and is helped into the ring by Omerta, then goes in to congratulate Xtreme Team. Then the SNW locker room begins to pour out. The Alley Ratz, the Destruction Crew, Johnny Moxie, Silvus, Stank Lovve, Cerise Richardson, and even Cyanide and Soul Reaper enter the ring to give their heartfelt congratulations to Xtreme Team as they, as well as the entire crowd, gives Xtreme Team a standing ovation as "Always" fades out.

PLEASE DON'T GO! PLEASE DON'T GO! PLEASE DON'T GO! PLEASE DON'T GO! PLEASE DON'T GO!

Tears begin to roll down the faces of Xtreme Team as "Friends Are Friends Forever" by Michael W. Smith begins to play over the PA. Mark Followill has left the broadcast table and enters the ring, giving big congratulatory hugs to Xtreme Team. Mark Bishop, Tammy Winters, IP Freely, Brenda Price, Harry Sachs and Misty Crawford all walk down the ramp and enter the ring to give their congratulations to Xtreme Team. Monica Deluca enters the ring to give her congratulations as well. Everyone hoists Xtreme Team and Sara Cannady up on their shoulders as Syco Boy and Dave Mason lift up their Texas Tag Team Titles up in the air, and the show fades to black.

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