Post by Hollywood on May 25, 2008 12:23:14 GMT -6
Mark Followill: Welcome, everyone to SNW Onslaught! I'm Mark Followill, alongside Jason Martel!
Jason Martel: And Mark, we're not wasting any time here at Trinity High School in Euless, TX! The ring is already set up for Sports Talk, and the Sports Nutz and Gordon Heath are already in the ring!
Shot switches to inside the ring. George, Craig and Gordie are all seated in SNW blow up recliners(the kind you blow up like a balloon). There's a coffee table with a couple of extra mics and bobble head doll representations of Gordie and the Sports Nutz. The crowd is booing at the top of their lungs as Gordie is wearing jeans and a blue LD Bell Blue Raiders T-shirt; Craig is wearing a white LD Bell Blue Raiders basketball jersey with blue shorts; and George is wearing jeans and a blue LD Bell Blue Raiders football jersey.
Mark Followill: Gordie and the Sports Nutz are making friends fast by wearing the attire of Trinity's rival high school.
Jason Martel: Hey, this is America! These three men are entitled to free speech.
Gordie, George and Craig all have mics in their hands. Gordie also has the contract that Wench and Hellspawn had signed at the press conference.
Gordie: Trinity High School, welcome to Sports Talk!
The fans now chant "BELL SUCKS! BELL SUCKS! BELL SUCKS! BELL SUCKS!"
Gordie: Tonight, my guest will be receiving a shot at the SNW Texas Championship on the first edition of Guys Night Out at the Lizard Lounge in Dallas. Ladies and gentlemen, Wench, along with Matt Margera!
"My Time" blares over the PA as the crowd jumps to their feet, cheering their lungs out as Wench and Matt Margera walk out from behind the curtain. They share a passionate kiss, then walk down the aisle to the ring, slapping hands with the fans on the way down. They enter the ring and pick up the extra mics. Matt and Wench look down at Gordie, George and Craig, who are sitting comfortably, and notice that there aren't any other chairs to sit in.
Gordie: Is there something that I can do for you?
Matt Margera: Well yeah, Wench and I don't have any chairs to sit in.
Dunpork: Sorry, but only the privileged get to sit down. And last I checked, only Gordie, Craig and I are privileged enough to get to sit down.
Wench: I've known you for over four years and you STILL don't know how to treat a lady.
Craig Mueller: Hey, you're the guests, and we're the hosts, and this is OUR show. So zip it!
Matt and Wench clench their fists but are able to control their anger at Gordie, George and Craig.
Gordie: Now I'm sure why I'd let you two be guests here on Sports Talk. I wanted to address the match you have coming up at Guys Night Out on June 21. Wench, you will be taking on Hellspawn for the Texas Championship.
Wench: And I plan on winning that Texas Championship and brining it home with Matt and I.
Gordie: Well you better win that match or you won't be going home.
Matt and Wench look puzzled at what Gordie has just said.
Gordie: Why do you two look so shocked? You did read the fine print, didn't you?
Matt Margera: Fine print?
Dunpork: Wait a second. You mean to tell us that you two are dumb enough to just sign a contract without reading it first?
Wench: What are you getting at?
Gordie: Wench, if you don't beat Hellspawn at Guys Night Out, you will have to be with Hellspawn.
Wench doesn't know what to say as the shock of the news comes over her. Matt is enraged and nails Gordie with the Benihana(superkick) to a tremendously loud pop. George and Craig shoot up out of their chairs and brawl with Matt. SNW officials rush down and get everyone separated.
Mark Followill: What a scumbag Gordie is for sneaking that piece of fine print in the contract!
Jason Martel: How is Gordie a scumbag? Wench knew better than to not read the contract!
Mark Followill: SNW officials are trying to restore order! We'll be back with our first match after this!
