Saturday Night Onslaught: 10/24/09

[Hollywood]

Shot opens to a montage of SNW highlights, set to the tune of "Psycho Circus" by KISS. The montage includes Johnny Moxie crashing through tables of light tubes and barbed wire on top of Mike Rutherford and Azrael, James Jackson nailing Andrew Smith with an STO, the Young Gunz destroying Codi Shane, Twitch smashing George Dunpork over the head with a Dunpork bobblehead doll, Chris Angel nailing Hellspawn with a flaming kendo stick, Super Vader grunting with the fans while holding the Von Erich Memorial Title over his shoulder, and ending with Vincent Matthews being hoisted onto the Sports Nutz shoulders and holding the SNW Texas Heavyweight Championship high in the air.

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LIVE!!! THE GORDIETORIUM!!! FT. WORTH, TX!!!

Shot opens inside the Gordietorium, as the masked man is making his way to the ring amid boos from the crowd. Goryokaku, sans Tanya Adams, ambushes the masked man, clotheslining him down to the floor, and kicking him in the ribs.

MARK FOLLOWILL
Welcome to Saturday Night Onslaught, and the action has already started as Goryokaku is attacking this masked man who's been stalking him for over a month now!

JASON MARTEL
That's about as fair as what happened to me and Koko last week!

MARK FOLLOWILL
Oh get over it already.

Goryokaku vs Masked Man

This masked man's moves looked vaguely familiar throughout the match, but Goryokaku kept fighting him off. Getting hit with the Crimson Lightning(looks like the Michinoku Driver) was an obvious clue for Gory as he kicked out at two. The masked man then went for the Dragon Wings DDT, but that didn't work either as again he only got a two count. The masked man then decided to climb to the top turnbuckle as Gory slowly got up. The masked man came flying off the top turnbuckle when... BAM!... Gory nailed him with the Gory Kick right as the masked man came flying down, knocking him out and giving Gory the 1-2-3.

MONICA DELUCA
Your winner of the match, Goryokaku!

MARK FOLLOWILL
And now, we'll finally see who this masked man is.

JASON MARTEL
I have a feeling I already know, based on some of those moves we saw.

Gory pulls the mask off and...

MARK FOLLOWILL
Dragon! We should've known that it was him!

JASON MARTEL
Of course! We all know that Dragon has been wanting to get revenge for the way Goryokaku had humiliated him so long ago!

Gory is standing in the ring, looking at Dragon when the familiar laugh begins echoing through the arena.

MASKED MAN
Gory, what are you thinking now? You thought you had it all figured out! But no, the man you know as Dragon is not me. Again, I have stayed one step ahead of you. I've watched your match with great interest tonight, Gory. Not because I want to learn more about you. I already know everything. But rather, to see your reaction when you found out you were wrong.

Gory throws the mask down as the lights go out and a spot light shines on Gory.

MASKED MAN
There you go, Gory. I know you love to have the spotlight on you. But you see, this light is what will be your downfall because you do not understand that sometimes you need to step out of the spotlight to succeed. The truth be told, Gory, I am tiring of playing this game with you. So next Saturday night on Guys Night Out from your very own Darkness Casino in Downtown Dallas, you will be in that ring again and you will face me. Not one of the fake ones but the real me. How fitting is it that on Halloween a night, when so many put on a mask to hide their true identity, you will be trying to take mine off to see what is underneath? I cannot wait to see your face when you fail I and unmask myself and reveal my true identity. You will then understand why all this has happened.

The laughter begins again and the lights come back up. Dragon is gone but a new masked man is in the ring. Gory turns around and gets taken down with a boot to the face. The masked man pulls Gory to his feet and lifts Gory over his head and throws him over the top rope to the floor. The masked man stands in the ring looking down at Gory on the floor.

MARK FOLLOWILL
Well if the masked man is not Dragon, then just who the hell is it?!

JASON MARTEL
How in the world do I know, Mark?!

Shot switches to show Andy Lionheart, Killer Kong, Super Vader and Mike "Beastman" Hanson walking down the hall on their way to the ring.

MARK FOLLOWILL
It's 8-man tag team mayhem as Andy Lionheart and the Destruction Crew take on Alex Daniels, Ricky Blair, Simon Sensation and Xalar Malum, next!

NEED A GOOD LAWYER? WELL DON'T CALL THE LAW OFFICES OF DEWEY, CHEATUM AND HOWE![/center]

[Hollywood]

"One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer" is playing over the PA as Andy Lionheart, Killer Kong, Super Vader and Mike Hanson make their way toward the ring to loud cheers from the crowd.

MARK FOLLOWILL
We're ready for the 8-man tag team contest... And apparently the team that will make Pure Wrestling Thunder can't wait to get the match underway as they ambush the New Wave of Destruction!

JASON MARTEL
Fight fire with fire, Mark!

Andy Lionheart & Destruction Crew vs Kid Thunder, Ricky Blair, Simon Sensation & Xalar Malum

This match up never truly got under way as the current team of Pure Wrestling Thunder tried to ambush Andy Lionheart and the Destruction Crew in the aisle. But Andy, Killer Kong, Mike Hanson and Super Vader were ready for Kid Thunder, Ricky Blair, Simon Sensation and Xalar Malum. It broke down into an all out brawl. The referee tried to get things under control, but Super Vader slammed him down with the Vader Bomb. More referees and other SNW officials ran down, only to get assaulted by everyone. Nobody would stop brawling until Matt Margera, Gordon Heath and the Sports Nutz put their differences aside to get security and even the police to run down to get everyone separated.

MARK FOLLOWILL
This has gotten chaotic as everyone is trying to separate these two teams!

JASON MARTEL
Imagine what it will be like at Natural Selection!

MARK FOLLOWILL
Right now, let's send it backstage to Misty Crawford, who's standing by with the latest regarding Katrina.

Shot switches to the backstage area, where Misty Crawford is standing in front of the Saturday Night Onslaught banner.

MISTY CRAWFORD
As you all saw last Saturday night on Guys Night Out, after the Fatal 4 Way match, Katrina collapsed outside the ring. What we've found out is that she was suffering from what is known as Post Concussion Syndrome. Fortunately, it's not as serious as thought, and she will be able to compete at Natural Selection on November 13. However, she must wait till then to compete.

DUNPORK'S HOUSE OF BACON, WHERE YOU CAN STUFF YOUR FACE LIKE A DISGUSTING PIG!

[Hollywood]

"Ghost Love Score" blares and Manny Saul walks out, donning an academic robe and a Dean's Mace. Manny holds the mace high over his head as he walks down the aisle amid some boos from the fans.

MONICA DELUCA
The following contest is set for one fall. Introducing first, from Lake Highlands, Texas and weighing in at 245 lbs, "Intellectual" Manny Saul!

MARK FOLLOWILL
This is the first time we'll get to see Manny in singles competition here in SNW as he gets set to take on Adriana Samu.

JASON MARTEL
And it's not right that Coach Tom Foolery isn't allowed down at ringside.

MARK FOLLOWILL
It's perfectly fair, Jason.

"I Love Myself Today" hits, and Adriana Samu appears from behind the curtain, rocking out with the fans at ringside as she makes her way down to the ring. A thong flies from out of nowhere and hits her in the head. She picks it up and shakes her head, rolling her eyes as she throws it back into the audience.

MONICA DELUCA
His opponent, hailing from Alberta, Canada and weighing in at 130 lbs, "Everyone's Favourite Canadian Lady" Adriana Samu!

MARK FOLLOWILL
Miss Samu certainly is "Everybody's Favourite Canadian Lady!" Just listen to the roar of these fans!

JASON MARTEL
She's not my favorite Canadian hag!

MARK FOLLOWILL
Oh for crying out loud!

JASON MARTEL
And another thing! What's with the damn thongs?!

Manny Saul vs Adriana Samu

Samu took control early on in the match as Manny went for a clothesline, only for Samu to duck under and Manny trip and fall down after the missed clothesline. Manny was caught off guard with the flurry of martial arts kicks that Samu peppered him with, as well as the aerial assault that she knocked him dizzy with. However, Manny was able to gain the upper hand when Samu went for a springboard DDT and Manny tackled her down with a spear. Manny continued to work Samu over, then went for the Intellectual Property, only for Samu to counter with a DDT that spiked Manny to hell. Samu then proceeded to climb to the top turnbuckle as Manny slowly got back to his feet. Samu came flying off the top turnbuckle and nailed Manny with the Tornado Kick off the top rope, then made the cover for the 1-2-3.

MONICA DELUCA
Your winner of the match, "Everyone's Favourite Canadian Lady" Adriana Samu!

MARK FOLLOWILL
Manny Saul seemed a bit off again tonight, though he did have a better showing for himself this week.

JASON MARTEL
I'm sure he'll finally get it turned around for the Wild Card Match at Natural Selection.

MARK FOLLOWILL
Speaking of which, let's take it to Brenda Price who's standing by inside the SNW Control Room with the Natural Selection Report.

Shot opens inside the SNW Control Room, where Brenda Price is standing by.

BRENDA PRICE
Welcome to the Natural Selection Report. I'm Brenda Price, and what a night we have in store for you on November 13! That's right, Friday the 13th, only on PPV from the sold out Super Pit in Denton, Texas. As you heard earlier from Misty Crawford, Katrina will be able to compete as she teams up with team captain "The Dream" Chris Angel, Alexander Draven and Emo Kid. They will take on team captain Goryokaku, who will be joined by Jade Claypool, Samuel Hale and Marcus Ryan, as the Army of the Gods get set to take on Insurgence in a special 4-on-4 Natural Selection Team Elimination Match. Now here's how these team elimination matches work. It starts out with two teams at full strength, then once someone is counted out, disqualified, pinned, made to submit or knocked out, they are sent to the back as the match continues. So you could see 3-on-2, 4-on-3, maybe even 5-on-1 for the other team elimination matches!

Speaking of... There will be a special Wild Card Match, consisting of teams that can't get along! One one side, you have "Intellectual" Manny Saul and Doomsday as co-captains, and they must team up with Y Kores as they form the Higher Authorities. On the other side, you have co-captains Soul Reaper and Cyanide, and they have to team up with Levetation, Linkin Strife and "The Real Deal" S.T. Strickler, as they form the Death Penalty.

In another team elimination bout, team captain Nick Scott leads the team of Silvus, the Alley Ratz, and get this! I was informed during the commercial break that filling in the final spot for Nick's team is none other than... Stank Lovve! You heard that right! Stank Lovve will make his return on November 13 at Natural Selection as he teams up with the rest of No Gimmicks Allowed. They will take on team captain Sean O'Brien, the Williams Brothers, and the CIA as they form the Unholy Squadron.

Another team elimination bout will see "Kid Thunder" Alex Daniels captain the team of Simon Sensation, "The SNW VIP" Ricky Blair, Xalar Malum and a mystery partner, as they take on team captain Andy Lionheart, who will be teaming with Killer Kong, Super Vader, Mike "Beastman" Hanson and the Mauler. It's Pure Wrestling Thunder taking on the New Wave of Destruction.

And the main event... a Last Man Standing Match for the SNW Texas Heavyweight Championship... The reigning Texas Champion, "The Warrior" Vincent Matthews takes on the leader of the Army of the Gods, Jack Clinton. Will Clinton finally be able to stake his claim as the absolute best in SNW? Or will Vincent Matthews outsmart him once again? There's only one way to find out, and that's to call your local cable or satellite provider and order Natural Selection on PPV! When we come back, Chris Angel puts his SNW Bad Blood Championship on the line against the Mauler in a Chairly Legal Match!


Credit Shaggy for the Natural Selection poster

[Hollywood]

"Big Gun" comes on the PA as Samuel Hale and Marcus Ryan come out from the back to the boos of the fans. Both men walk down the aisle acting extremely cool, and join Mark Followill and Jason Martel at the broadcast table.

MARK FOLLOWILL
Our next match will be for the Bad Blood Title, and we've got a pair of special guests here on commentary for this match.

JASON MARTEL
Step aside Fozzywil, I'll do the intros around here. Folks, please welcome the most dominant tag team in SNW today. They are two members of the best stable going in SNW, the Young Gunz Samuel Hale and Marcus Ryan. Hello gentlemen!

SAMUEL HALE
Good lord Jason, catch your breath before you start sucking us off again.

JASON MARTEL
Sorry.

SAMUEL HALE
No problem. Onto other business, we don't want you to worry. If Clinton attacks you again, we'll handle him. Thanks for having us out here for this match. We do like to expand our talents outside the ring.

MARCUS RYAN
Where's that hot piece that is usually out here? Tanya or something?

MARK FOLLOWILL
You mean Tammy Winters? She's on the Guys Night Out team, and this is Saturday Night Onslaught. Good to see you're paying attention.

MARCUS RYAN
Watch your mouth smartass. Don't make me use my boot to turn you into a woman.

"One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer" blares over the PA, and the fans cheer as The Mauler comes out from the back swinging his trademark chain like a madman all around the place. He slaps the outstreched hands of the fans as he comes down to the ring.

MONICA DELUCA
Ladies and gentlemen the following contest is a Chairly Legal match scheduled for one fall, and it is for the SNW Bad Blood Championship! Making his way to the ring first is the challenger... from Flint, Michigan... weighing in at 315 lbs., The Mauler!

Mauler rambles into the ring,dropping his chain on the floor in the process. He climbs the turnbuckle and yells "HUSS! HUSS! HUSS!" as the fans repeat it back to him.

MARK FOLLOWILL
The Chairly Legal match is a very interesting match. For those who have never seen it, you will see that the ring is littered with different times of chairs and weapons and such. Those are all legal in this match.

SAMUEL HALE
Someone explain to me who let this babbling retard into SNW? I know Destruction Crew has the standards of a desperate fan woman whose never gotten any before, but good lord! At least the rest of their members can speak right.

MARK FOLLOWILL
Now that is just an out of bounds shot on your part. Mauler has been a very successful competitor here at SNW. Why are you acting like a Southlake doucher?

MARCUS RYAN
See Mark, when you are a success story, you find out that you are much better than pretty much everyone else including Huss Boy in the ring there. I know you probably still sit at home playing Dungeons and Dragons and waxing your carrot while wearing Spock ears. That's why you can't understand how great we are.

JASON MARTEL
God I love this announce team! Let's get rid of Followill and replace them with you two!

MARK FOLLOWILL
Where's that bottle of Wild Turkey...

"Stranglehold" comes on the PA, and the fans cheer even louder as the SNW Bad Blood Champion, Chris Angel, comes out to the aisle. Wearing his Bad Blood Title on his shoulder, he slaps hands with the fans at ringside. All the girls giggle and shriek when he comes near them.

MONICA DELUCA
His opponent the champion, from Los Angeles, California by way of Dallas, Texas and weighing in at 280 lbs... the SNW Bad Blood Champion... "The Dream" Chris Angel!

Angel climbs into the ring, and poses on the turnbuckle with his hands in the air holding the Bad Blood Title. He hops down, and hands the belt to the referee as he finishes his prematch adjustments.

MARK FOLLOWILL
Chris Angel has flown under the radar somewhat as one of the better pure competitors in SNW. He's got another test tonight however, as he will be facing off in a fairly violent match.

JASON MARTEL
It's sad that we've got two of the best competitors sitting at ringside, and these two jokes are in the ring fighting for a title. What do you two think about that?

SAMUEL HALE
Well listen Jason, it's fairly simple. Once these jokers basically kill each other in that ring with those weapons, eventually the rest of the roster will destruct as well. We take care of ourselves, and we know how much punishment we can take. I'm not worried as we'll get our chance because eventually and we will be THE group in SNW.

MARCUS RYAN
Hells yeah! We will run this joint, snapping necks and cashing checks. We will be able to slay any amount of tail we so choose.

MARK FOLLOWILL
Good lord, end this now please!

The Mauler vs. "The Dream" Chris Angel(c): Chairly Legal Match for the SNW Bad Blood Championship

The referee held up the belt, and rang the bell. From the get-go, this match devolved from a wrestling contest to an all out war. Each competitor grabbed a chair and started the match with a chair duel. Mauler got more force behind his chair shot, and knocked Angel's weapon out of his hand and clobbered him in the head. Mauler then ripped one of the light tubes off a chair and smashed that over Angel's back. Mauler exited the ring and grabbed his chain, and wrapped it around one of the chairs. However, when he re-appeared in the ring Angel had found a barbed wire chair and slammed it into Mauler's knee causing him to fall to his knees. Angel went to town, slamming the barbed wire chair into his back over and over again until Mauler's back began to bleed. Angel then grabbed Mauler and threw him in the corner, putting a light tube covered chair in front of his face. Angel backed up and ran full force, landing a boot into the chair and smashed the light tubes in Mauler's face. Angel picked Mauler up, but Mauler fought back with everything he had. The two competitors fought back and forth for over ten minutes with every variation of a steel chair they could get their hands on, and hitting each other with moves from their arsenal onto numerous steel chair variations. However, at the end, with Mauler writhing in pain, Angel exited the ring and came back up with two regular chairs. He then came up with a lighter and lighter fluid. He set the two chairs up with the seats facing inwards towards each other. He then soaked the chairs in fluid and lit them ablaze. Angel quickly grabbed Mauler, and hit him with the Fallen through the flaming chairs as the fans chanted "HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT!" Angel hooked the leg and got the three count to retain his title.

MONICA DELUCA
Here is your winner, and STILL SNW Bad Blood Champion, "The Dream" Chris Angel!

MARK FOLLOWILL
This match turned out to be just as violent and brutal as expected. Chris Angel in the end turned it on high, as he slammed Mauler with that vicious sitdown power bomb through two flaming chairs!

JASON MARTEL
That was just obscenely violent and Angel should feel ashamed of himself. What do you two think?

SAMUEL HALE
Marcus, this match has given me an idea. You thinking what I'm thinking?

MARCUS RYAN
Does it involve Captain Morgan and strippers?

SAMUEL HALE
Not at all.

MARCUS RYAN
Then I am now.

SAMUEL HALE
I never thought I'd say this, but thank you Chris Angel. You have given us a great idea. Fozzywill, Martel we must depart but I predict you will see us again.

Hale and Ryan stand up from the broadcast table, take their headsets off, and go into the back dicussing and planning all the way back. Shot switches to the inside of Gordon Heath's office. Gordie and the Sports Nutz enter the room, with Gordie falling down into his chair and letting out a big sigh.

GORDIE
Is it too much to ask for one week of guys who hate each other not tearing this place apart?! God, I hope Pure Wrestling Thunder puts the New Wave of Destruction out of commission.

Matt Margera enters the room as George, Craig and Gordie roll their eyes.

GORDIE
You know you can knock, right?

MATT MARGERA
And you know I'm co-owner, right?

GORDIE
Whatever. Why are you here?

MATT MARGERA
Well, to inform you that after tonight, I will no longer be co-owner of SNW. I have decided to come out of retirement and become an active competitor once again as I want nothing more than to get my hands on "The Real Deal" S.T. Strickler for what he did to Katrina.

GORDIE
Lovely. But now that you'll be an active competitor, that means you have to be in whatever match that either I, Craig or George say that you're in.

MATT MARGERA
Well you better hurry and make that match now, because as of midnight tonight, your new co-owner will own 50% of the company.

GORDIE
Excuse me... NEW co-owner?

MATT MARGERA
Yes, new co-owner. Last night, I sold my shares of SNW to an old friend of ours...

In walks none other than the ever beautiful and radiant blond bombshell, Codi Shane! Gordie, George and Craig stand there in shock and awe.

GORDIE
Does Kat know about this?!

CODI SHANE
Who do you think put Matt back in touch with me? Of course she knows about it, and she's forgiven me AND Matt. Anyway, Gordie, Craig, George... I think you three have a match to make.

GORIDE
Ah yes. Hold on just a moment.

Gordie, George and Craig huddle together, trying to put their thinking caps on as Matt and Codi shake their heads and chuckle. Gordie and the Sports Nutz break out of the huddle.

DUNPORK
Alright, we've made the match. Craig, why don't you do the honors.

CRAIG MUELLER
My pleasure. Matt, next week on Guys Night Out at the Darkness Casino in Downtown Dallas, you will be competing against someone you know rather well. In fact, one person is someone you've screwed over in the past, and another person is someone who just flat out doesn't like you. Actually, there's another person in this match that doesn't like you either. In a Fatal 4 Way Match, first fall to a finish, you will be taking on Adriana Samu, Doomsday, and Soul Reaper! Good luck, because you're going to need it.

Matt grins and turns to leave, only to knock George Dunpork out with a Benihana out of nowhere! Craig and Gordie scramble to go down and check on him as Matt leaves the office. Codi looks down at George, turns to look at Matt, and shakes her head with a smile on her face.

SNW WRESTLESTOCK 2, FROM COWBOYS STADIUM, AKA THE DEATH STAR, IN ARLINGTON, TEXAS! MARCH 27, 2010! TICKETS ON SALE NOW!

[Hollywood]

The "Miami Vice" theme song plays, and the crowd begins to boo but is soon reduced to gasps of shock and awe as the special referee, Myke Rhines, comes out from the back wearing nothing but a referee striped speedo. Rhines has a slow gait, being old and such, as he almost slips and falls as he climbs into the ring.

MONICA DELUCA
Ladies and gentlemen, your special referee for the main event tonight... Myke Rhines!

MARK FOLLOWILL
It's time for our main event, but this has a very odd and looks to be disturbing twist. The referee is Insurgence's resident geezer, Myke Rhines.

JASON MARTEL
Geezer? He is a very experienced elder, sir, and you should be showing him some more respect.

MARK FOLLOWILL
Well quite frankly, I think this is just another ploy to try and get Jack Clinton weakened before his Last Man Standing match with Vincent Matthews at Natural Selection.

JASON MARTEL
Look at you, such a conspiracy wacko. Next thing your going to tell me was that Balloon Boy was fake.

MARK FOLLOWILL
Uhhh... Jason, the sheriff came out and said it was a hoax. They are filing charges. Clinton must have pounded your head in pretty good.

JASON MARTEL
What's that Mark? All I can hear is a high pitched whistle.

"My Time" plays over the PA, and the fans boo as S.T. Strickler comes out and walks down the aisle from the backstage area. Spreading his arms as to welcome the jeers, Strickler walks down the aisle like his is in command and is not affected at all by the venom he is experiencing.

MONICA DELUCA
Ladies and gentlemen the following contest is scheduled for one fall. Making his way to the ring first, from Winchester, Virginia... weighing in at 180 lbs... "The Real Deal" S.T. Strickler!

Strickler hops on the apron, poses cockily for a moment and then climbs into the ring. He jumps on the turnbuckle and acts showy and confident even as the fans boo him out of the building. He jumps down and warms up lightly.

MARK FOLLOWILL
S.T. Strickler may have bitten off more than he can chew here. He is directly responsible for the collapse of Katrina, and he now has to deal with Jack Clinton here tonight.

JASON MARTEL
Please, how arrogant is it to blame S.T. Strickler for Katrina not having enough of a spine to hold up to the rigors of being an athlete? She's losing her nerve, which obviously contributed to her loss to Super Vader that cost her the title.

MARK FOLLOWILL
Did you not get enough of an ass beating last week from Clinton? Because at the rate you are going you're getting ready for another one.

JASON MARTEL
Please, all I am doing is speaking the truth. I'm just like Michael Moore, persecuted for speaking the truth no one wants to here.

MARK FOLLOWILL
You're in Texas. You really just like getting beat like a red headed stepchild by bringing up that liberal Beluga whale.

JASON MARTEL
Nice to see your being tolerant and accepting with others that are not of the same political bent.

"Enter Sandman" booms over the PA, and the fans cheer as a very angry Jack Clinton comes out from the back. Walking to the ring at a pace that could easily be considered quick and furious, Clinton makes no bones of his feelings as they are quite apparent.

MONICA DELUCA
His opponent from San Diego, California and weighing in at 355 lbs., Jack Clinton!

Clinton climbs in the ring, forgoing turnbuckle showmanship. Instead he keeps his focus first on Strickler, then on Rhines as he moves lightly in his corner.

MARK FOLLOWILL
You've got to think Clinton has pure revenge and punishment on his mind, but he better keep his eye on the "special referee" who may try to turn this into Montreal all over again.

JASON MARTEL
No comment.

MARK FOLLOWILL
What do you mean no comment?

JASON MARTEL
I have no comment, except go Strickler!

MARK FOLLOWILL
Well here we go, our main event is ready to get underway...wait what's this?

All of a sudden "This Fire Burns" plays over the PA, and unexpectedly the SNW Texas Champion Vincent Matthews walks out from the back with the belt hoisted on his shoulder. Wearing a Lyoto Machida Affliction shirt, ripped black jeans and shades he ignores the crowd that is booing him to high holy hell. He walks over to the timekeeper's area, and pulls out a chair and sits down a decent distance from the ring just staring into it.

MARK FOLLOWILL
This is just an outrage! There is no need for the Texas Champion to be out here right now! Clinton already has to contend with Rhines as a referee!

JASON MARTEL
Oh come on, he's just scouting for Natural Selection leave him alone.

MARK FOLLOWILL
Oh look, Mr. No Comment perked up when he saw his man crush.

JASON MARTEL
Matthews is much more upstanding and respectful than you, Followill. He's not going to interfere. I'lll guarantee it.

"The Real Deal" S.T. Strickler vs. Jack Clinton(special referee: Myke Rhines)

Rhines signaled for the bell to be rung via a pelvic thrust, and the match was just as wheels off as that particular act. Jack Clinton used his considerable size advantage to control the early part of the match. Clinton hit Strickler with several hard hitting clothesline, and a big boot to the chest that floored Strickler. Clinton went for a pin, however Rhines was distracted by some buxom blonde in the front row that was wearing a tank top and no bra. Clinton stood up, and grabbed Rhines by the throat and told him to make the count. Clinton bent down for the cover, but got caught in a quick roll up and Rhines delivered the quickest two count in history before Clinton was able to break out of it. Strickler then went on the offensive, which utilized a lot of dirty tactics. Rhines was conveniently adjusting his Speedo when Strickler hit a low blow when Clinton had him locked in for a German suplex. Strickler then took advantage, bouncing off the ropes for a bulldog. He then locked in the half crab, to which Rhines dropped to his stomach and kept asking Clinton "do you want to give up, or somesuch." Clinton did not, and was able to use his long frame to grab the bottom rope. However, Rhines was conversing with Vincent Matthews on the side of the ring and did not see this. Upon turning around, he saw it and proceeded to start the longest five count to break a hold ever. Strickler eventually broke it and got off of Clinton. Clinton struggled to his feet, as Strickler waited with baited breath for him to get to his feet. Strickler went to hook him up with the Fisherman's Buster, however he didn't have the strength to hit him with it. Clinton nailed a knee to the gut, grabbed Stricker by the neck, and hit him with the Final Destruction. Clinton fell on him for the pin, but Rhines was not even interested in making the count. Clinton angrily got up, and started jawing at Rhines telling him to do his damn jaw. Rhines gives it right back, and points down to his Speedo telling him that he's the referee. Clinton then grabbed Rhines, and hit the Three Stroy Hell Ride on him too. Matthews jumpd to his feet and looked furious at this, throwing off his sunglasses and had an enraged look in his eye. Clinton then laid across Stricker, and picked up and dropped Rhines' arm three times to register the three count and win the match.

MONICA DELUCA
Here is your winner of the match, Jack Clinton!

MARK FOLLOWILL
Chalk that win up to Jack Clinton doing whatever it took to get the win. When Myke Rhines refused to count after Clinton hit the Final Destruction on Strickler, Clinton responded by hitting the Three Story Hell Ride on Rhines and forcing him to make the count himself.

JASON MARTEL
That is blatantly against the rules! You can't do that! He knocked out an official referee! There will be hell to pay for this.

MARK FOLLOWILL
Rhines got what was coming to him because he was acting biased towards Strickler the entire match.

JASON MARTEL
Looks like we will see some ringside justice, as Vincent Matthews has climbed into the ring to confront Clinton.

Matthews had indeed climbed into the ring, the title belt still on his shoulder. He and Clinton stared each other down, before Clinton motioned for Matthews to go ahead and come get some. The crowd cheered hoping to see Clinton assault Matthews, and they looked like they were going to get it. Matthews set down the belt in the corner, and slipped his shirt off. Matthews then stood and stared at Clinton a moment, however all of a sudden from behind Samuel Hale and Marcus Ryan ran in from the back each carrying a chair. Before Clinton could react, both swung their chairs and hit Clinton in the head with a two man Conchairto. Clinton's head smashed between the two chairs, and he went down immediately like a sack of potatoes. Matthews stood over his lifeless form for a moment, however not for too long as Chris Angel, Emo Kid, and Alexander Draven ran out to force the trio from the ring. All three Insurgence members hightailed it from the ring and back up the aisle. Draven and Emo Kid stood at the ropes while Angel checked on Clinton and called for medical personnel to come out and help. Matthews raised the hands of both Ryan and Hale as the show went to black.