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Post by Hollywood on Feb 13, 2010 22:15:28 GMT -6
Shot opens to a montage of SNW highlights, set to the tune of "Psycho Circus" by KISS. The montage includes Johnny Moxie crashing through tables of light tubes and barbed wire on top of Mike Rutherford and Azrael, James Jackson nailing Andrew Smith with an STO, the Young Gunz destroying Codi Shane, Twitch smashing George Dunpork over the head with a Dunpork bobblehead doll, Chris Angel nailing Hellspawn with a flaming kendo stick, Katrina holding up the Von Erich Memorial Title at 4 Up, and ending with Vincent Matthews being hoisted onto the Sports Nutz shoulders and holding the SNW Texas Heavyweight Championship high in the air. [/color] 
The fans at the Plano Center go up in a rage as the show begins. The scenes of the DFW skyline go by, as Mark Followill and Jason Martel tell the viewers at home what is upcoming on the show tonight.MARK FOLLOWILL
Hello fans, and welcome to a very special edition of Saturday Night Onslaught! We come to you tonight from Ticketstock 2010, and do we have a show for you tonight!
JASON MARTEL
That's right, as "The Living Legend" Matt Margera teams up with the SNW Texas Tag Team Champions The Young Gunz to take on Death Sentence and the SNW Bad Blood Champion Chris Angel in six man tag action!
MARK FOLLOWILL
We will also see the debut of Chris P., as he takes on "Kid Thunder" Alex Daniels. Jack Clinton will be in Chris's corner, so who knows what the Hell will happen!
JASON MARTEL
We will also see Triple Threat Tag team action, as the resident stoners The Alley Ratz take on the team of Alexander Draven and Andy Lionheart, as well as SINner's Law!
MARK FOLLOWILL
We will also see Versus Vince and Tyler Guevara in singles action, Adriana Samu face off against Manny Saul, and Brenda Price will fill us in on just what is in store for WrestleStock II at the Deathstar! The fans cheer, and all of a sudden "Cotton Eye Joe" plays over the sound system. The fans look confused, then erupt as Nolan Ryan walks out. He stands at the top of the aisle, with a microphone in hand. NOLAN RYAN
Hello there Texas Ranger, Ticket P1s, and SNW fans! Welcome to this very very special episode of Saturday Night Onslaught. I'm your guest host Nolan Ryan, and I'd like to say I am damn glad to see all you fellers out there tonight. I was backstage making up some possum vittles, and rattlesnake kabobs, which are all available at the Nolan Ryan concession stands along with raccoon stir fry, wombat and rice, hyena tar tar, stink bug ice cream, and of course my specialty llama piss beer. Anyway, I was back there talking to my nephew Marcus and I am just so excited about being here. I really hope that you all have a great time out here, and I really hope that...uh oh.Nolan gets distracted, as something catches his eye backstage. All of a sudden ten snow monkeys come out from the back chasing him, and Nolan high tails it to the ring as the snow monkeys chase him. He pulls out a six shooter, and puts two of them down but eight are left. Nolan is yelling and hollering, and out to the ring runs Marcus Ryan. He's carrying a baseball bat, and swatting at the monkeys. All of a sudden, twenty more run out and swarm the pair. They beat a path through the monkeys, and scamper to the backstage area with the snow monkeys hot on their tail. Most of the fans are laughing, some look genuinely concerned. MARK FOLLOWILL
Well, not a great start to the show for our guest host. Let's hope he is OK to continue the show.
JASON MARTEL
Did you see Marcus swing that bat? He looked like Josh Hamilton out there!SPORTS NUTZ WRESTLING, WHERE UNLIKE OTHER PROMOTIONS, THERE IS ACTUALLY WRESTLING ON THE WRESTLING PROGRAM, NOT LONG DRAWN OUT NOVELS WITH RAPE AND MURDER THAT HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH THE SPORT OF KINGS![/center] |
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Post by Hollywood on Feb 13, 2010 22:21:34 GMT -6
Shot opens at the broadcast location, where Mark Followill and Jason Martel are sitting wearing their headsets.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Earlier tonight, there was an unfortunate incident involving Nolan Ryan, Marcus "The Storm" Ryan and lord knows how many snow monkeys, with Nolan shooting two of them. We're happy to report that Nolan had loaded his gun with tranquilizer needles, not bullets.
JASON MARTEL
Well gee, I feel alot better now, knowing that we only risked everyone going to sleep for a day instead of being shot to death!
"Voodoo" by Black Sabbath hits and Vinny Appice, with Coach Tom Foolery leading the way, steps out onto the Plano Centre stage to loud boos from the crowd. He's wearing a black "Sports Authority" track suit. [/color] MONICA DELUCA
This match is set for one fall. Introducing first, accompanied to the ring by Coach Tom Foolery... from Brooklyn, New York and weighing 230 lbs, Vinny Appice!
MARK FOLLOWILL
Not counting that so called "triple threat" match with him and Tony Manzetti taking on Chris Angel, which was really a glorified handicap match, this is the first time that I can recall seeing Vinny Appice in singles competition here in SNW.
JASON MARTEL
Normally, that would put Vinny at a disadvantage as his opponent has tons of experience in singles competition. But his opponent is Adriana Samu.
MARK FOLLOWILL
So?
JASON MARTEL
So, Adriana Samu is a woman.
MARK FOLLOWILL
What about Wench?
JASON MARTEL
That's different. Wench is a femme fatale.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Oh give me a break!Vinny calmly walks down to the ring and violently rips off his pants and track jacket and rolls into the ring, but not before yelling at a fan that has a sign that says "I DON'T SEE A CAMERA."MARK FOLLOWILL
Vinny Appice doesn't seem to be pleased with that fan's sign.
JASON MARTEL
Vinny has every right to be angry at that fan for mocking him.The fans cheer their heads off as "I Love Myself Today" blares over the PA, prompting Xander Nova to walk out onto the Plano Centre stage and lead Adriana Samu out to the ring.MONICA DELUCA
His opponent, from Alberta, Canada and weighing 130 lbs... accompanied to the ring by Xander Nova... "Everyone's Favourite Canadian Lady" Adriana Samu!
MARK FOLLOWILL
Adriana Samu and Manny Saul are certainly no strangers to each other, dating back to their days up in the Great White North when the original Sports Authority waged war with Canada's Greatest Stable.
JASON MARTEL
And if I'm not mistaken, it was the Sports Authority that came out on top in that war.
Vinny Appice vs Adriana SamuVinny angered Samu early on in the bout when he flicked his chin in her direction, causing her to run and nail him with a vicious forearm smash to the face. Samu had the advantage early on, but her anger got the better of her as she went for a DDT, only for Vinny to counter with a Fisherman's Suplex, only getting a two count. Vinny continued to work Samu over, even taking time out to talk trash to Xander Nova, to which Nova would roll his eyes. With Vinny distracted, Samu caught him from behind with a Russian Leg Sweep to turn the match back into her favor. The two continued to go back and forth for several minutes Vinny faked an injury, distracting referee Danny Travers as Samu went to the apron. Meanwhile, Samu played to the crowd, and Coach Tom Foolery seemed to make some sort of transaction which resulted in former Ticketchick Angie handing Tom a football that she had signed by Barry Sanders, and Tom handing her what looked like some form of currency. Toward the end, Samu got onto the ring apron and went for a springboard move. But Coach Tom Foolery rared back and threw a perfect spiral, the football blasting Samu in the back of the head and knocking her off the top ropes and down onto the canvas. Xander Nova, infuriated by what was going on, jumped onto the apron, but the ref ran over and admonished him for his outburst as Vinny hopped up as if there was nothing wrong with him and climbed to the top turnbuckle. Coach Tom Foolery ran over and grabbed Nova off the apron, and the two got into a big brawl that went all the way into the crowd, with the two of them fighting all the way toward one of the exits that led to the concourse area, which the ref just blew off. He turned around to see Vinny landing the Cement Shoes on Samu, then going for the cover, giving Vinny the three count, which the crowd did not approve of in the least.MONICA DELUCA
Here is your winner, Vinny Appice!
JASON MARTEL
A big victory for the Right!
MARK FOLLOWILL
Believe me when I say that the Sports Authority does not represent what the true conservatives stand for.
JASON MARTEL
And what an arm by Coach Tom Foolery!
MARK FOLLOWILL
And I wonder what he paid Angie to give him that autographed football. I knew something was up when she blew me off earlier.
JASON MARTEL
Hey, you're a married man. What are you doing trying to talk to Ticketchicks, sir?
MARK FOLLOWILL
I was just simply saying hello to a former co-worker, sir. Now, we have learned that while Marcus Ryan is ready to go and will not miss the six man tonight. However, Nolan Ryan will not be able to continue as guest host for the night. So, let's throw it back to our next guest host of the night, and I'll be honest I don't think this is a good decision, Bob Sturm!The shot cuts to the backstage area, where Bob Sturm is standing infront of an SNW banner looking very eager.BOB STURM
Alright, SNW has made me the uh special guest host and uh, now again I'm not saying that uh I will be better than uh Nolan Ryan, because let's face it Nolan Ryan is uh great, but he is uh not nearly as good as Brett Favre. Heretofor, comparing football and baseball players really doesn't uh work out, but I am doing it uh anyway. Anyway, I've got a blockbuster announcement that will shape the history of SNW as we uh know it, more than uh Favre going to the uh Viqueens. So, the announcement uh is...Before Sturm can finish, two very large men in suits walk up to Sturm. They are both wearing sunglasses, Rolexes, and bulges on their person indicate that they could be carrying various types of weapons. GOON #1
Yeah uh, we here representing Big Anthony Marishiano. Someone very informed told us we could find a Mr. Norm Hitzges here.
GOON #2
He owes our esteemed boss quite a bit of money involving wagers of a sports nature. Do you know where we can find him?BOB STURM
Well uh, and not to say that I'm not Norm Hitzges...GOON #2
Did he just say he was Norm Hitzges?
GOON #1
He didn't say he wasn't, so I think he is. GET HIM!All of a sudden the first goon jumps on top of Sturm, tackling him to the ground. Sturm is yelling, but the goon punches him in the head, knocking him unconscious. The two goons lift up Sturm, and drag him off.SITTIN' ON YOUR ASS WHILE YOUR WIFE BRINGS HOME THE CASH! SPORTS NUTZ WRESTLING![/center] |
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Post by Hollywood on Feb 13, 2010 22:48:22 GMT -6
MARK FOLLOWILL
Welcome back to Saturday Night Onslaught ladies and gentlemen. We have just heard that Misty Crawford is standing outside of the Plano Centre. Misty what is going on?
The screen switches to a shot of Misty Crawford standing outside. There are tons of people walking around. A couple of them stand behind Misty trying to get their face on TV.
MISTY CRAWFORD
Well Mark, rumors are flying all over the place that Syco Boy is going to be here tonight to address what happened at The Main Event. He has not arrived just yet but I’ll be standing out here, braving the cold, until he arrives.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Thanks Misty, we look forward to hearing from you later in the night.
JASON MARTEL
What a bimbo, standing out in the cold outside all night. At least she’s not waiting on some loser like Tony Romo.
MARK FOLLOWILL
That’s because Tony Romo isn’t here.
JASON MARTEL
And he’s not here because the Cowboys aren’t celebrating a Super Bowl like the Saints are.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Whatever.
"American Lab Rat" blares over the PA, and the fans boo as the politically minded Tyler Guevara strides out from the back. His massive frame walks down the aisle, as fans yell various conspiracy theories at him in an obvious attempt to patronize him. Guevara does his best not to get distracted as he gets to the ring.
MONICA DELUCA
Ladies and gentlemen the following contest is scheduled for one fall. Making his way to the ring, from Jacksonville, Florida. Weighing in at 300 lbs., "The American Lab Rat" Tyler Guevara!
Guevara lifts his big leg over the top rope, and stands solid in the ring looking around as to check for US spy satellites or anyone wielding a sniper rifle with magic bullets.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Well unlike the Mavericks lately, Tyler Guevara picked up a victory last week against Andy Lionheart in a wildly entertaining match that had Guevara reversing Lionheart's finisher into the M.I.A.
JASON MARTEL
Mavericks bashing aside, I'm glad to see that you are giving Tyler some credit.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Well, as much as I think he might be better off in a four sided padded room than a four sided wrestling ring, whatever Guevera has come upon has really rejuvenated his in ring career.
JASON MARTEL
And look who he drew tonight. This little popcorn fart Versus Vince, whose like a little person compared to Tyler.
MARK FOLLOWILL
I believe they prefer the term midget Jason.
JASON MARTEL
That's very offensive, but I know you refer to JJ Barea a lot so I'll let it slide.
"You Can Run" booms over the sound system, and the fans cheer as Versus Vince runs out from the back. Pointing and yelling enthusiastically and slapping hands with the fans as he runs down the aisle, he is a ball of energy.
MONICA DELUCA
His opponent, from Truth or Consequences, New Mexico. Weighing in at 195 lbs., Versus Vince!
Vince rolls under the ropes, and jumps rapidly up on the turnbuckle posing while Guevara just shakes his head and mutters what can only be insults at his opponent.
MARK FOLLOWILL
So we are set for action here, as Tyler Guevara is ready to take on JJ Barea.
JASON MARTEL
Uhhh Mark, that's Versus Vince. JJ Barea is the short Hispanic that continues to spare your Dallas Mavericks to death.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Well Jason you're right. I also see where Versus Vince won his debut match last week, so I don't possibly understand how I could make that mistake since JJ Barea can't win anything.
JASON MARTEL
No argument here, but I don't see the American Lab Rat falling here to this undersized rodent.
"The American Lab Rat" Tyler Guevara vs. Versus Vince
The match started, and early on The American Lab Rat imposed his will upon the smaller newcomer. Vince came at Guevara with no lack of enthusiasm, but the size difference was too much to overcome in the outset. A headbutt to the chest when Vince went for a springboard moonsault just took the wind out of his opponent, and a pin attempt garnered him a two count. Guevara then punished him with an abdominal stretch that went on until Vince kicked Guevara in the shin and Lindsey Vonn'ed him enough to free himself. Back and forth the rest of the match went, as Vince was able to get some traction and fight back. A springboard clothesline staggered Guevara, but when Vince went for a missile dropkick Guevara lifted his boot and blasted him straight in the face with a big boot. Another pin attempt got him a two count. Guevara picked up Vince, and slung him into the corner, and quickly nailed him with a boot to the chest. The crowd started booing heavily, and even some chants of "YOU'RE A BULLY" started up. Guevara pulled away, and began yelling at a few of the fans that were antagonizing him. Eventually Guevara got security over there to take care of the fans, and turned around to face Vince. Vince had regained his composure, perched himself on the top turnbuckle, and to the shock of everyone hit a moonsault onto Guevara that sent both to the mat in a pin attempt. The referee counted three, and the bell rung as Vince looked around, and quickly scattered from the ring. The referee followed suit, and raised Vince's hand as Tyler got on his knees not believing what just happened. The fans ate it up, cheering their heads off.
MONICA DELUCA
Here is your winner of the match, Versus Vince!
MARK FOLLOWILL
In the words of the great Ron Simmons, DAMN!
JASON MARTEL
What the Hell!?!?! That was a fast count, that referee was paid! When did SNW hire Earl Hebner to officiate their matches?
MARK FOLLOWILL
Someone JJ Barea...err I mean Versus Vince pulled off the upset. Tyler Guevara got sidetracked by some ornery fans, and Vince made the most of his opportunity.
JASON MARTEL
You can never confuse him with JJ Barea again Mark.
MARK FOLLOWILL
That's right, he took his opportunity and made the most of it. He won didn't he? More than that absolute abortion of a team Mark Cuban has been running out there.
THE DALLAS MAVERICKS: SPARING EVERYONE TO DEATH MEDIOCRE PLAY AND UNCOMMITTED PLAYERS SINCE 1980! |
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Post by Hollywood on Feb 13, 2010 22:49:38 GMT -6
"Numb" blares over the PA, and the fans boo as SINner's Law, accompanied by Doomsday, come out from the back. Linkin Strife and Xalar Malum raise their arms in the entryway, and proceed to walk to the ring with Doomsday leading the way.
MONICA DELUCA
Ladies and gentlemen, the following is a triple threat elimination tag team match. Making their way to the ring first, accompanied to the ring by Doomsday. Linkin Strife and Xalar Malum, SINner's Law!
Malum and Strife climbed through the ropes, while Doomsday stayed outside as his two charges climbed the turnbuckles and flexed while the crowd booed the two men.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Getting set for triple threat tag team action here, and each of these teams could do with a win, SINner's Law especially.
JASON MARTEL
These two mighty buffaloes could really do with a win, and I think going up against two stoners and a couple of foreigners could be just the trick.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Well, in all fairness Jason the Mavericks have won more than these two fellows so I'm not sure your assessment is accurate.
JASON MARTEL
Well the difference there is SINner's Law always tries, and isn't run by a goofy idiot with a bowl cut.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Touche.
"Sons of the Staves of Time" booms over the PA, and the fans cheer as Alexander Draven slowly walks from the backstage area to the ring. The fans continue to cheer, but he pays no attention to their cries as he continues his somber pace.
MONICA DELUCA
Team #2, first from Lowestoft, England. Weighing in at 280 lbs., Alexander Draven!
Draven pulls himself up on the apron, then climbs over the top rope while the two SINner's Law members keep an eye on him.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Been some time since we've seen Alexander Draven, and tonight he teams with fellow European countryman Andy Lionheart to make up the second team of this trio tag.
JASON MARTEL
We need to get rid of all these Europeans, we need to be more American!
MARK FOLLOWILL
Why do you say that?
JASON MARTEL
You don't think so? If you are against America, then you can just go to France!
"This War is Ours" screeches over the PA, and the fans continue cheering as Andy Lionheart wildly runs out from the backstage area. Streaking down the aisle, he slaps hands furiously with the fans as he slides into the ring and joins his partner.
MONICA DELUCA
His partner, from Kemi, Finland. Weighing in at 210 lbs., "The New Wave of Extreme" Andy Lionheart!
MARK FOLLOWILL
A good combination of size and speed here could give Draven and Lionheart the advantage in this match.
JASON MARTEL
Yes, but the fact they are European just cancels out what you just said.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Jason, I'm patriotic as well but you are just taking this too far.
JASON MARTEL
Obviously you aren't, as you are against America. COMMIE!
"Chicken Huntin'" plays over the sound system, and the fans cheer as Twitch and Eddy, accompanied by their omnipresent cloud of smoke behind them, come out from the back. Slapping the fan's hands and coughing slightly, the Alley Ratz walk down to the ring.
MONICA DELUCA
Team #3, Twitch and Eddy, the Alley Ratz!
The Ratz climb through the second rope, and pose on the turnbuckles as the other teams look on.
MARK FOLLOWILL
The Alley Ratz are former SNW Texas Tag Team Champs, so one must check the experience column in their favor here.
JASON MARTEL
I've got a hot rumor Mark, about the Alley Ratz possibly expanding to include a third member.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Really now? Could you be talking about someone from WRF joining up with Twitch and Eddy?
JASON MARTEl
Nope.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Well who then?
JASON MARTEL
My sources tell me that Josh Howard has reached out and wants to get in with SNW. He told them he's got no basketball talent left, and wants to try his hand at this. He felt that the Alley Ratz shared his priorities.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Wow, that's crazy man.
SINner's Law vs. Alexander Draven and Andy Lionheart vs. The Alley Ratz.
The bell rung, and before the referee could get the match under control, the Alley Ratz went after Linkin Strife, while Draven and Lionheart pounced on Xalar Malum. The four men beat down their two opponents. Before the referee settled the match down, Twitch and Eddy had hit the 420 Dropzone on Strife, and Malum had fallen victim to both Atonement and Dark Twist. Malum was left as one legal man, and Eddy remained in the ring. Eddy covered Malum, got the three count, and like that SINner's Law was eliminated. The fans cheered as Doomsday had to help his charges to the back. Andy Lionheart climbed into the ring, and the two men slapped hands out of respect for each other. Eddy and Lionheart fought for a few minutes, trading moves back and forth. Eddy nailed a DDT on Lionheart, who sprung right back up with and hit a Jawbreaker on Eddy. Eddy went for a crossbody, but Lionheart ducked and hit a spear that garnered a two count. Lionheart tagged out to Draven, who proceeded to control Eddy for a good portion of the match. A sleeper hold occupied him, however Eddy was able to get out of it after the referee dropped his hand twice. Draven went for a clothesline, but Eddy ducked, and dropkicked Draven forward into the Alley Ratz corner. Eddy tagged in Twitch, who sprinted across the ring and kicked Lionheart off the apron. Eddy and Twitch acted quickly, hitting Draven with the 420 Dropzone. Twitch climbed the turnbuckles as Eddy exited, and hit the Faygo Splash on the proven Draven. He covered Draven, and got the three count and the win.
MONICA DELUCA
Here are your winners, Twitch and Eddy, the Alley Ratz!
MARK FOLLOWILL
An exciting match that saw the Alley Ratz double team Alexander Draven and get the win. One must wonder how this will affect their standings in the tag team rankings.
JASON MARTEL
Well if they get Josh Howard to join who knows what they could do.
MARK FOLLOWILL
I'm not sure, in my own personal experience J-Ho has done nothing but bring teams down.
JASON MARTEL
Well, this could work out either way for me then.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Now I understand that Misty Crawford has something to report on from outside. [/b] Shot switches to Misty, where she is standing by the street with a crowd of people.MISTY CRAWFORD
I have just gotten a report that says Syco Boy IS HERE! He is on his way to arena right now and…Before she can finish her sentence a brand new 2010 Ford Escape slams on brakes right outside at the street and stops. The driver steps out and walks around the car revealing himself as Syco Boy. He walks by Misty but stops and turns. He then throws his keys at her.SYCO BOY
Try not to get any scratches on it. It’s a rental.MISTY CRAWFORD
But I’m not...
SYCO BOY
I’m sorry. I forgot to tip you.Syco walks back and plants a huge kiss on Misty. He starts walking back and spits before walking into the arena. Shot switches to Misty as she has a disgusted look on her face as the show goes to a commercial break.[/color] VALENTINES DAY: THE CRAPTACULAR HOLIDAY THAT TELLS THE WORLD "LOOK AT US, WE ARE A BUNCH OF GREEDY, HORNY MORONS!"[/center] |
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Post by Hollywood on Feb 13, 2010 22:55:47 GMT -6
Show returns to "Monster" blaring from the PA system. Syco Boy walks out and dances around and pretending to slap fans hands before pulling his hand back, which garners heckling and catcalls from the fans. He walks down to the ring and slides under the bottom rope, then dances around the ring jumping up and down before grabbing a mic.
SYCO BOY
Boy it feels great to be back here in FRISCO, TEXAS!
The crowd boos as Syco Boy smiles and puts his thumb up in the air trying to get the cheap pop.
SYCO BOY
What? What did I say?
A stagehand goes over to Syco and whispers something in his ear.
SYCO BOY
Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know people just wanted to say that they were from plain old Texas.
JASON MARTEL
He’s right about that. Texas is very plain these days.
SYCO BOY
But enough about Texas. At The Main Event, both Levetation and S.T. Strickler finally learned why they called me the Sycotic One. Ever since I was knocked out of action by the two bimbos who don’t know how to take a loss, I’ve been sitting at home waiting for the chance to come back and show SNW that they don’t mess with me. Then I saw you two bickering one night while watching SNW. And I finally figured it out. You two were the perfect people I was looking for to set an example. What you don’t kill, simply will come back and kill you.
The crowd erupts with boos. [/color] SYCO BOY
Oh shut up. Levetation, one time you tried taking me out, and you failed epically. And Strickler, you left laying in that cage without even trying to stop them from injuring me. And it hit me, why not fake an injury? I wasn’t ready to compete just yet any way. So this is the perfect opportunity. I buddy you up and you let you guard down. And that’s when I strike. You see you never let your guard down. You let your guard and someone will come and kick your ass. And that’s just what I did. I didn’t do it just because I could. I did it because these people deserve someone on this show that can actually wrestle. And you two think you’re deserving of something great, when you can’t wrestle your way out of a paper bag.The boos from the crowd get louder
MARK FOLLOWILL
Syco Boy better be careful of what he is saying.
JASON MARTEL
I can’t believe I’m saying this, but Syco is right!
SYCO BOY
So ladies and germs, I’M BACK! And Lev and Strickler, you two are first on my list to take out.Syco Boy drops his mic and the arena bursts into a loud chorus of boos.The theme from WrestleMania 6 is playing in the background as the camera shot switches to the SNW Control Room, with Brenda Price standing in front of dozens of TV monitors showing action from SNW's past. Brenda Price is standing by as the music plays in the background while she announces the matches for the WrestleStock II card.BRENDA PRICE
Hello, everyone, and here is your WrestleStock II Report. WrestleStock II comes to you live from Cowboys Stadium, the Death Star if you will, in Arlington, Texas. The event has been sold out for weeks, and the only way to see it is live on a Pay Per View basis Saturday night, March 27, at 7 PM Eastern/6 PM Central. A huge main event is in store as for the first time ever in SNW, it will be champion vs. champion, title for title as SNW Bad Blood Champion "The Dream" Chris Angel goes one on one with SNW Texas Heavyweight Champion "The Warrior" Vincent Matthews. Now as I understand, Vincent Matthews knows what the match stipulation is. Let's go to some pre-recorded comments that hopefully will shine some light on what the match will be.The shot cuts into the Albano-Williams Center, where all the lights are out except one that sheds light over the ring in the center of the largest room. Surrounding the ring on the outside are walls twenty foot high of steel, and inside the ring set up is a 20 foot ladder. There is no roof to enclose the structure, and sitting on top of the ladder is Vincent Matthews. His SNW Texas Championship around his waist, his look could be described by some as sadistic.VINCENT MATTHEWS
Just when you thought my violent side was satiated, the belly of the beast gets hungry again. Chris Angel, take a very close look at the scene I have encompassed myself within right now. Because on March 27th, should you want to attempt to keep your Bad Blood Title and on the very outside chance of taking my Texas Title from me, then you will have to brave a match so gruesome and destructive Satan himself is scared to think about it. Twenty foot of steel traps us like wild animals, with no easy way out. The only way to end this match, is for someone to climb this ladder, and pull down the two titles. There are no rules, there are no restrictions. This match is not for the weak at heart, but more for the blackened souls. You wanted a shot at the Texas Title Chris Angel, but I can promise you there will be a price to pay. Because neither of us will come out the same after this match, but only one of us will come out what really matters. The champion. Chris Angel, on March 27th, welcome to Lucifer's Last Stand!Matthews gets up and stands on the very top of the ladder, unhooks his belt from around his waist, and holds it up in the air like the trophy it is as the shot cuts back to Brenda Price, who is in a state of shock over what was just said.BRENDA PRICE
Can you believe that? The Lucifer's Last Stand Match, a first here in SNW, and I believe in professional wrestling. A steel cage that surrounds the entire ringside area, and a ladder inside, and the object of the match is to climb the ladder, reach up and grab both the Bad Blood and Texas Heavyweight Championship belts. One has to think that neither Chris Angel nor Vincent Matthews will be the same after this match is over.
Also at WrestleStock II, the SNW Texas Tag Team Titles will be on the line as the current reigning Texas Tag Team Champions, the Young Gunz with Myke Rhines in their corner, will defend the belts against Death Sentence.
The Balance of Power Scaffold Match, where in order to win, you must climb the scaffold inside the ring and grab the briefcase containing a contract for an SNW Texas Heavyweight Championship match that can be invoked at any time for up to a year. The participants as of right now include: "The American Lab Rat" Tyler Guevara and Andy Lionheart. And now we have learned that two new wrestlers have been added to the Balance of Power Scaffold Match: Versus Vince and "The Living Legend" Matt Margera.
Another match just added to the lineup will see "The Real Deal" S.T. Strickler, Levetation and Syco Boy all go at it in a Three Way Dance where anything goes. It will be elimination style, so the match will not end until two wrestlers are pinned or made to submit, as there will be no disqualifications or count outs.
WrestleStock is an event like no other. It's like the Super Bowl, the World Series, the Stanley Cup Finals, the NBA Finals, March Madness and the Daytona 500 all rolled into one! Don't be left out! Call your local cable or satellite provider now and order WrestleStock II, live Saturday night, March 27 at 7 PM Eastern/6 PM Central.
WRESTLESTOCK II! LIVE FROM THE SOLD OUT COWBOYS STADIUM IN ARLINGTON, TEXAS! SATURDAY NIGHT, MARCH 27! 7 PM EST/6 PM CST! ONLY ON PAY PER VIEW![/center] |
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Post by Hollywood on Feb 13, 2010 23:33:59 GMT -6
"Superhero" blasts over the speakers, and "Kid Thunder" Alex Daniels makes his way down to the ring to tremendously loud boos from the crowd. He spots a fan wearing a Hornswaggle T-shirt and holding a sign that says "CHAVO SAYS HI!" Angered, Kid Thunder grabs the sign and tears it up, garnering more heckling from the rabid crowd of Ticket P1s.
MONICA DELUCA
This match is set for one fall. Introducing first, from Toronto, Ontario, Canada and weighing 220 lbs, "Kid Thunder" Alex Daniels!
MARK FOLLOWILL
Kid Thunder, not too thrilled about losing to Wench last week on Guys Night Out.
JASON MARTEL
Well of course he's not happy about losing a high stakes match, Followill. I mean, unlike J-Ho, who is on his way out of Dallas, Kid Thunder doesn't throw parties after losing a big match.
MARK FOLLOWILL
No, he throws temper tantrums.
Kid Thunder rolls into the ring, taking off his entrance attire as his music dies down. "This Means War" booms over the PA, and Chris P. appears from behind the curtain with Jack Clinton following behind. Chris P. runs over to face one side of the audience, pumping them up as they cheer him on, then does the same for the other side of the audience, then strolls down the aisle, slapping hands with the fans.
MONICA DELUCA
His opponent, accompanied by Jack Clinton... hailing from Clifton, New Jersey and weighing in at 260 lbs, Chris P!
MARK FOLLOWILL
And now we get to see what Chris P. is made of as he makes his in ring debut against "Kid Thunder" Alex Daniels.
JASON MARTEL
Chris P. is going to be eating his words from his interviews earlier this week on SNW.com, that's a guarantee!
Chris P. vs "Kid Thunder" Alex Daniels
Alex tried to ambush Chris as he slid into the ring, but Chris was ready for him as he ducked a clothesline, only for Kid Thunder to turn around and eat a standing dropkick. Chris continued to dominate Kid Thunder in the early moments of the match as Jack Clinton and the crowd cheered him on. However, the tide turned as Chris went for a sidewalk slam, only for Kid Thunder to reverse it into a flying headscissors takedown. Kid Thunder worked Chris over with his technical wrestling ability, speed and quickness. Chris got the match back into his favor as Kid Thunder went for a German suplex, only for Chris P to block, turn and reverse the go behind and slam Kid Thunder down with a German suplex of his own. Chris continued to work over Kid Thunder, throwing him to the outside of the ring, working him over some more. Chris rolled Kid Thunder back into the ring, then played to the crowd, allowing Kid Thunder a chance to work his way back to his feet. Chris climbed onto the apron, grabbed a hold of the ropes and went for a sunset flip, only for Kid Thunder to block and sit down across Chris's chest. All referee Mike Croft could see was Chris P's shoulders down on the mat, not seeing Kid Thunder holding onto the ropes as the ref counted to three, giving Kid Thunder the win as the crowd booed in disapproval.
MONICA DELUCA
Your winner of the match, "Kid Thunder" Alex Daniels!
MARK FOLLOWILL
What a cheap win!
JASON MARTEL
Cheap win? Give me a break, Fozzywill. Kid Thunder's been cheated by these crooked referees in SNW, so I don't blame him for doing what he has to in order to win.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Clinton charges into the ring, and Alex Daniels gets out of there as fast as he can like the chicken he is.
JASON MARTEL
That's not chicken. That's smart.
Shot switches to the backstage area, where Misty Crawford is standing by with Chris Angel in front of the Saturday Night Onslaught banner, holding his SNW Bad Blood Championship over his shoulder.
MISTY CRAWFORD
I'm standing by with the SNW Bad Blood Champion, "The Dream" Chris Angel. Chris, we now know that you will be facing SNW Texas Heavyweight Champion, "The Warrior" Vincent Matthews, in what is billed the Lucifer's Last Stand Match. Surrounding the ring similar to how the Hell in a Cell surrounds a ring will be a 20 foot high open air cage. Inside will be a ladder, and hanging up in the air will be both your Bad Blood Championship and Vincent's Texas Heavyweight Championship, and the first man to climb the ladder and grab both belts will be declared the winner. Needless to say, it's easier said than done.
CHRIS ANGEL
It doesn't surprise me that Vincent Matthews was allowed to devise such a match in order to try and stop me from being able to take the Texas Heavyweight Championship away from him. This is a match that could very well shave years off of both our careers, even end our careers early. But that's a risk I'm willing to take in order to continue the rich heritage of the Texas Heavyweight Championship, a championship that has been held by the likes of Lou Thesz, Buddy Rogers, Antonino Rocca, Verne Gagne, the Original Sheik, Johnny Valentine, Bull Curry, Fritz Von Erich, Wahoo McDaniel, Jose Lothario, Blackjack Mulligan, Jimmy Snuka, Bruiser Brody, David Von Erich, Gino Hernandez, Jimmy Garvin, and Kevin Von Erich... and that's just to name a few! Vincent, I'll be coming for that title on March 27. But tonight, I have business to attend to, teaming up with Death Sentence to take on Matt Margera and the Young Gunz.
MISTY CRAWFORD
Speaking of which, can you trust Death Sentence in the match tonight?
CHRIS ANGEL
Well I'm going to have to in order to take care of business. I understand where they're coming from, taking care of themselves first. After all, this is a business that doesn't lend itself to many friendships. But we have a common enemy, and that's the locker room cancers that are Insurgence, Matt Margera, Wench, and the Sports Nutz. Last week, Death Sentence sent a strong message, plastering the Sports Nutz all over Sundance Square. Tonight, Soul Reaper, Cyanide and I will send a strong message when we take care of Matt Margera and the Young Gunz. Hell, I might take out that old fart, Myke Rhines, one more time.
THE NORM HITZGES TRIPLE PLAY GUARANTEE! GUARANTEED TO MAKE YOU A MILLIONAIRE, OR WE'LL BE STANDING IN LINE FOR WELFARE CHECKS WITH YOU! |
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Post by Hollywood on Feb 14, 2010 0:54:19 GMT -6
"Big Gun" blasts over the PA, and out walk the Young Gunz with Myke Rhines following behind them, much to the chagrin of the crowd that is booing them out of the building. Samuel Hale and Marcus Ryan just smirk at the audience, not thinking much of their heckling.
MONICA DELUCA
The following is a six man tag team match, set for one fall! First, accompanied to the ring by Myke Rhines, the team of Samuel Hale and Marcus "The Storm" Ryan... the reigning SNW Texas Tag Team Champions... the Young Gunz!
MARK FOLLOWILL
What a couple of jackasses, who are only Texas Tag Team Champions because of Vincent Matthews being able to manipulate Gordon Heath!
JASON MARTEL
Hey, you've gotta have talent to be a champion, Followill. And believe me, these guys have more talent than all the athletes that have been here at Ticketstock this weekend.
"Not Dancing, Wanna Know Why?" hits, and out from behind the curtain walk Matt Margera and Wench, who ignore the boos and catcalls of the fans. In his right hand, he carries a stick with a horse head on it, and his other hand is free for him to put his arm over Wench's shoulder.
MONICA DELUCA
Their partner, from Hurst, Texas and weighing in at 220 lbs... accompanied by Wench... "The Living Legend" Matt Margera!
MARK FOLLOWILL
Talk about someone doing a complete 180. Matt Margera was one of the most popular wrestlers in SNW, and now doesn't give a damn.
JASON MARTEL
Oh come on, Mark. You should've known better than to think that Matt Margera was what you think of as an honorable man.
As they make it to the ring, Matt allows Wench to walk up the steps first, then follows her inside the ring. Wench taunts the fans as Matt goes to one of the corners, climbs up to the middle turnbuckle and points at the fans with the stick he carries to the ring, sneering at the booing audience while his music dies down. "Indestructible" hits, and the crowd goes insane. As the main riff of the song comes on, green lights flash and a smoke comes over the entry way. Soul Reaper and Cyanide come out and start to walk down to the ring.
MONICA DELUCA
Their opponents... first, the team of Soul Reaper and Cyanide, Death Sentence!
MARK FOLLOWILL
No love lost here with these men.
JASON MARTEL
And I have a feeling the war won't be settled here.
Death Sentence slaps hands on their way to the ring, but don't get into the ring just yet as their music dies down. "Stranglehold" hits, and Chris Angel saunters out, his head titled slightly towards the crowd, his face in a grin as he nods appreciatively towards the cheers. Walking down the aisle, Angel slaps hands with his fans.
MONICA DELUCA
Their partner, currently residing in Los Angeles, California by way of Dallas, Texas and weighing 280 lbs... the SNW Bad Blood Champion... "The Dream" Chris Angel!
Angel forgoes his usual entrance routine, sprinting down to the ring, along with Death Sentence, taking Margera and the Young Gunz by surprise.
Chris Angel and Death Sentence vs Matt Margera and Young Gunz
The match started off as a knockdown dragout, with Angel and Death Sentence getting the better of Margera and the Young Gunz, forcing them to retreat to the outside. Angel and Death Sentence just followed them outside, continuing the beatdown and rolling them back into the ring. With referee Rick Maynard distracted with the other wrestlers inside the ring, Myke Rhines hit Angel with a weak forearm shot to the back, which Angel no-sold. Angel turned around, backing Rhines down, only for Wench to come in from behind and give Angel a low blow, with Wench and Rhines working together to roll Angel back into the ring. The Young Gunz and Margera all took turns working Angel over, coming close to putting him away on several occasions, but not being able to get the job done. Margera went for the Viva La Claw, but Angel blocked it, countering with a DDT. Margera crawled over to make the tag to Marcus Ryan, only for Angel to tag in Cyanide. The two went back and forth, only for Samuel Hale to run in and help his partner, prompting Soul Reaper to run in and join in on the fun. Matt Margera was able to get back into the ring, then Angel got in, and before you know it, a six man melee broke out. The referee ran out of the ring, calling for the bell, which rang frantically to no avail as all six men kept brawling everywhere, taking it outside of the ring and brawling all over the Plano Centre, tearing up the various booths that had been set up.
MARK FOLLOWILL
It's safe to say this match has been thrown out as the referee lost all control!
JASON MARTEL
Speaking of control, Chris Angel is choking Matt Margera with a wired Playstation 3 controller cord!
MARK FOLLOWILL
Death Sentence and the Young Gunz have disappeared, and it's safe to say they're taking their fight outside the Plano Centre... Wait a second, there's James Jackson... AND HE TAKES WENCH'S HEAD OFF WITH A SUPERKICK!
JASON MARTEL
The very move that Matt Margera taught Wench! Matt will not be happy when he sees the tape!
MARK FOLLOWILL
Fans, our time is up! I hope this doesn't come as the shocker to you all, but we are done!
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