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Post by Hollywood on May 8, 2010 21:45:48 GMT -6
In a pre-show dark match:
Chase Daniels def. Greg Wilson after hitting God's Gift.
"Thunderkiss 65" plays in the background as a video montage of SNW highlights is played. [/i][/color]  LIVE FROM THE GORDIETORIUM!!!
FORT WORTH, TX!!!
The fans are going crazy inside the Gordietorium as they're ready for Saturday Night Onslaught.MARK FOLLOWILL
Live from the Gordietorium in Downtown Fort Worth, it's the last Saturday Night Onslaught before we head down to San Antonio to present 4 Up! I'm Mark Followill, alongside Jason Martel!
JASON MARTEL
And what a show we have lined up, Followill. By the way, welcome back. Surprised you're here tonight because the Dallas Mavericks... oh wait, that's right, they were bounced out of the playoffs! Hahaha!
MARK FOLLOWILL
Oh very funny.The camera switches over to the entrance area, and we see Mike LaFontaine flying through the entrance curtain and onto the floor. Danny Palis follows after him, stomping away at LaFontaine, then picking him up and continuously ramming his head into the security railing all the way down the aisle on the way to the ring.MARK FOLLOWILL
Well we were scheduled to open the show with Danny "The Sahara Reign" Palis in a rematch against Mike LaFontaine, and it's apparent that Danny jumped LaFontaine before the bell has even rung!
JASON MARTEL
Danny Palis isn't going to allow what happened at the Ridglea Theatre a couple of weeks ago repeat itself here tonight!Palis continues to pepper LaFontaine with right hands, then rolls him into the ring, following him in.
Danny Palis vs Mike LaFontaine
Danny Palis would not let up on LaFontaine as he set out to prove that what happened the last time they met was a fluke. Palis punished LaFontaine for a couple of minutes before finally putting him away with the King Buck crossface.
Winner: Danny "The Sahara Reign" Palis
"Badstreet USA" plays over the loudspeakers as Palis sneers at everyone who is heckling him.MONICA DELUCA
Here is your winner by submission, Danny "The Sahara Reign" Palis!
MARK FOLLOWILL
Well unlike what happened in the series between Dallas and San Antonio, the better man won this match up.
JASON MARTEL
I bet Mike LaFontaine is wishing right now that he hadn't won that match up.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Right now, let's send it backstage where Misty Crawford is standing by with the Alley Ratz.Misty Crawford is standing by with the #1 contenders to the SNW Texas Tag Team Titles, the Alley Ratz.MISTY CRAWFORD
I'm here with the Alley Ratz. Guys, you are a few weeks away from receiving your title shot at Death Sentence. But over the past few shows, you have both suffered singles defeats to your future opponents. Does this hurt your momentum going into the title match?
TWITCH
Well Misty, my dear, the truth is we are a little dissapointed in ourselves for both falling to Soul Reaper and Cyanide. But it happened and there's nothing we can do about it except make sure that our failures in singles action doesn't repeat itself where it matters when we take on Death Sentence for those Texas Tag Titles. Reaper and Cyanide, I hope you don't think that based on what's happened when you took us on one on one is going to happen when we get back together again and come looking for those titles. You guys have proven yourselves as SNW's most lethal team. Now the responsibilty of taking those belts away from you falls into our laps, the laps of the team that many still consider the underdogs, the underdogs who are biting off more then we can chew as usual. You figure we'd learn by now. Nah not us. We kinda have a learning disability when it comes to something like that and we just keep on going.
EDDY
Death Sentence, we are going to have our game together and are going to be ready for the fight of our lives, and it's not going to stop until we land that one-two-three and win the belts and have the position of the team that has to be chased instead of the team that has to chase all the time.
TWITCH
Reaper, Cyanide, you got the duke over us in singles action, in the tag team realm, where we strive. We will prove how strong the Juggalo nation truly is.A montage of highlights from the past two 4 Up events is shown, set to the tune of "Illegal Fun" by Hardcore Superstar.
The most violent wrestling show in all of the state of Texas heads to San Antonio! Barbed wire, light tubes, chains, thumbtacks, ladders, chairs and the Cage of Death! Who will Texas Champion Chris Angel present the Bad Blood Title to?
Plus, Chris Angel must defend his Texas Title against "Mr. Balance of Power" Jack Clinton! Death Sentence defend the Texas Tag Team Titles against the Alley Ratz! And the first ever Destruction Crew All You Can Destroy Buffet Invitational!
It's 4 Up! Live, Saturday night, May 22, at 8 PM EST/7 PM CST, only on PPV!THE NEIGHBORHOOD CAFE! OPEN TUES-FRI, 6:30 AM- 2:30 PM, AND SATURDAYS, 7 AM- 12 PM! SERVING DOWN HOME COOKING FOR BREAKFAST AND LUNCH IN THE CITY OF HURST FOR OVER 40 YEARS! GO IN AND SAY HI TO MATT THE P1 VIRGIN![/center] |
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Post by Hollywood on May 8, 2010 21:46:13 GMT -6
"Club Foot" is playing over the PA as Jakob Cross has already entered the ring, his entrance taking place right before the show came back on the air.
MONICA DELUCA
This match is set for one fall! Introducing first, from London, England and weighing 225 lbs, Jakob "The Templar" Cross!
MARK FOLLOWILL
After a very impressive showing last week on Guys Night Out, Jakob Cross goes one on one against Simon Sensation.
JASON MARTEL
I predict that Jakob Cross fades out quicker than Baron.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Now that was uncalled for!
Some gold and blue lights start flashing near the entryway as "Simply the Best" starts to play and Simon Sensation makes his way out from behind the curtain and stands there in his black robe, looking around at the crowd with a smirk. He slowly makes his way to the ring to a mixed reaction from the crowd.
MONICA DELUCA
His opponent, from Las Vegas, Nevada and weighing 227 lbs, Simon Sensation!
MARK FOLLOWILL
Simon Sensation, along with Johnny Moxie, made a successful return two weeks ago on the special edition of Saturday Night Onslaught at the Ridglea Theatre when they defeated Y Kores. And from what we've seen on SNW.com, the team of SiMox don't shy away from sharing their HSOs.
JASON MARTEL
I don't know what to make of SiMox just yet. I do like their sense of urgency, that much is for sure.
Sensation arrives to the ring, hopping onto the apron and getting on a knee as he smirks at the fans and slowly rises to his feet. He smirks as he steps through the ropes, gets into the ring and then takes his robe off before dumping it on the ring attendant.
Jakob Cross vs Simon Sensation
Jakob Cross immediately went for a superkick, but Sensation ducked underneath. Cross turned around, only for Sensation to hoist him up on his shoulders and slam him down with a Samoan Drop, and it all went downhill from there for Cross as Sensation dominated him from pillar to post. Sensation went for a pin on Cross after turning a full nelson into a sit down facebuster, but let Cross up at two, shaking his head and indicating he wasn't through. Sensation then went for a Russian Leg Sweep, bouncing Cross against the ropes so that the momentum brought them down forward, slamming Cross down facefirst. Sensation went for another pin, and again, brought Cross up at two. Finally, Sensation hit Cross with the Sin City Slam for the one, two, three.
Winner: Simon Sensation
MONICA DELUCA
Here is your winner, Simon Sensation!
MARK FOLLOWILL
Well either Jakob Cross was yet another flash in the pan to go along with failed bits such as Derek Sitar, Evan Bodom, Beer, Josh Knox, and Baron, or he just had an off night.
JASON MARTEL
I'm going to say he's a failed bit, Mark.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Well one person who's not a failed bit is Brenda Price, who's standing by with the latest on 4 Up!
The shot statics out, then statics into a camera shot to an obviously pre-taped promo of Brenda Price standing in front of the SNW banner in a random room at the Gordietorium.
BRENDA PRICE
Ladies and gentlemen, we're only two weeks away from 4 Up, the most violent wrestling show in the state of Texas! 4 Up can only be seen on PPV, Saturday night, May 22 at 8 PM EST/7PM CST, from the Empire Theatre in San Antonio, Texas. 4 Up is possibly the most unique wrestling show. It starts with a 16 person battle royal, where the order of elimination determines which fatal 4 way match a wrestler is entered into. Then, the four winners of the four 4 way stipulation matches will do battle inside the Cage of Death, with each winner bringing the weapon or weapons representing the match they were in. The first four eliminated will go into the Light Tube Deathmatch. The second four eliminated will enter the TLC: Thumbtacks, Ladders and Chairs match. The third four eliminated go into the Barbed Wire Match. And the final four remaining in the ring will take part in the Chain Match. Here are the participants that we have announced thus far:
Versus Vince...
Syco Boy...
"The Real Deal" S.T. Strickler...
"The American Lab Rat" Tyler Guevara...
"Everyone's Favourite Canadian Lady" Adriana Samu...
Mike "Beastman" Hanson...
Levetation...
Wench...
Andy Lionheart...
Simon Sensation...
Chris P...
"The Modern Day Hero" James Jackson...
and Jakob "The Templar Cross.
Those thirteen are being joined by the newest arrivals to SNW...
Danny "The Sahara Reign" Palis
"God's Gift" Chase Daniels
and "The Solution" Tyler Straven.
Which one of these sixteen wrestlers will make it all the way to the Cage of Death, escape the cage, and receive the Bad Blood Title from Chris Angel at the end of the night? Only way to find out is to call your cable or satellite provider and order 4 Up on PPV.
Also on the card... the Texas Heavyweight Championship goes on the line as the current Texas Champion, "The Dream" Chris Angel, defends his title against Jack Clinton, who has chosen to cash in his Balance of Power contract at 4 Up.
The Texas Tag Team Titles will go on the line as Death Sentence defend their titles against the Alley Ratz.
And this year at 4 Up, we will have the first ever Destruction Crew All You Can Destroy Buffet Invitational. There will be tables of food and other assorted weapons that the participants can use against each other. Elimination occurs either by pinfall or submission, and the last wrestler standing receives a shot at the Bad Blood Title at a later date. The participants in the Destruction Crew All You Can Destroy Buffet Invitational include:
Super Vader...
Killer Kong...
The Mauler...
"The Assassin" Rory Kotch...
"The Other Girl" Petrina Rotchester...
Johnny Moxie...
Seth Davids...
Kijar Donnelly...
and lastly, Benson from the Enforcers of Pain.
Fans, don't be left out. Order 4 Up on PPV from your cable or satellite provider now! 4 Up takes place Saturday night, May 22, at 8 PM EST/7 PM CST from the Empire Theatre in San Antonio, Texas. Don't miss out!
SNW WRESTLESTOCK II! AVAILABLE NOW ON DVD AND BLU RAY! BONUS DISC WITH THE ENTIRE SPORTYS BROADCAST INCLUDED! |
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Post by Hollywood on May 8, 2010 21:47:30 GMT -6
Shot opens in Jakob Cross' locker room, which has been trashed, everything strewn about and turned over. Cross is lying down on the floor unconscious, the result of an apparent beatdown. EMTs are rushing in to check on him.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Welcome back to Saturday Night Onslaught, and as you can see, Jakob "The Templar" Cross has been laid out. By who, we don't know.
JASON MARTEL
Good riddance is what I say.
The opening sounds of "I Can't Wait" start to play throughout the Gordietorium. After several seconds, the the drums kick in and out from the back walks Johnny Moxie to a mixed reaction from the crowd. He can't help but be a bit perplexed by the fact that some fans are booing him.
MONICA DELUCA
The following contest is an 8 Person Tag Team match, set for one fall. Introducing first, from Manhattan, New York and weighing 215 lbs, Johnny Moxie!
MARK FOLLOWILL
Moxie's tag team partner, Simon Sensation, was successful earlier tonight against Jakob Cross. Will Johnny Moxie experience similar success?
JASON MARTEL
That's really a toss up. For one, Moxie has the talent, but sometimes his mind wanders. Then you add in he's teaming with Y Kores, and we know they can't get the job done. Yet they're facing the most disgusting slobs in all of SNW, the Destruction Crew, who are led by that no-good swindler, the Gambler. So who knows what's going to happen. I just hope they beat each other senseless.
Moxie arrives to the ring and hops up onto the apron, pulling himself up slowly as he turns his back to the ropes. He raises his hands, then turns around and leaps over the ropes to the inside of the ring, limbering up as his music fades. "You Better Pray" blasts over the speakers, and the fans all cheer in unison as Xander Nova leads out Adriana Samu, with Rory Kotch on one side of Samu, and Petrina Rotchester on the other side. They proceed to make their way down to the ring, slapping hands with the fans on the way down.
MONICA DELUCA
His partners, led to the ring by Xander Nova, the team of Adriana Samu, Rory Kotch and Petrina Rotchester, Y Kores!
MARK FOLLOWILL
Y Kores are hoping to bounce back, and Adriana Samu's tag team win with Mike Hanson last week on Guys Night Out may have been a step in the right direction.
JASON MARTEL
Oh please! Samu didn't even do anything in that match. She just got lucky that the Gambler wanted Mike Hanson to take the rest of the night off after doing all the work.
Adriana jumps up onto the apron and then onto the turnbuckle facing the fans. Petrina and Rory pose on either side of her on the apron, then all three enter the ring as Moxie rolls his eyes while Y Kores' music fades out. The main chorus of "One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer" kicks in, and the Gambler leads out the entire Destruction Crew to a huge pop from the crowd.
MONICA DELUCA
Their opponents, accompanied to the ring by the Gambler... Super Vader, Mike "Beastman" Hanson, Killer Kong, and the Mauler... the Destruction Crew!
MARK FOLLOWILL
Possibly the wildest group of wrestlers in all of Sports Nutz Wrestling will have their hands full at 4 Up. Mike Hanson will be taking part in the unique 4 Up tournament, while Super Vader, Killer Kong and the Mauler host the Destruction Crew All You Can Destroy Buffet Invitational.
JASON MARTEL
I feel bad for these guys.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Why is that?
JASON MARTEL
The Gambler is the smartest one out of all them, which means that sooner or later, he'll swindle them out of all their money, and they'll be out on the streets!
MARK FOLLOWILL
Oh come on!
JASON MARTEL
Well it's true!
MARK FOLLOWILL
You going to post that on your Twitter account?
JASON MARTEL
No, because I don't want the inbred morons up in North Dakota to email Gordon Heath and Codi Shane and force them to fire me.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Nevermind you've just said it on national TV!
JASON MARTEL
But we all know that you can only judge a person's true character by what they post on Twitter.
The Destruction Crew enter the ring and immediately begin brawling with whoever they can.
Destruction Crew vs Johnny Moxie and Y Kores
The match got off to a very wild start as all eight wrestlers were going at it inside and outside the ring. The referee just stood there and watched on as the match degenerated into a fight, which the fans enjoyed very much. Even the Gambler and Xander Nova got into it, exchanging fisticuffs and ramming each other's heads into the security rails. Mike Hanson gave Adriana Samu a glimpse of what could be her future at 4 Up when he took a steel chair and smashed it over her head, knocking her down to the floor and busting her wide open. Killer Kong and Super Vader had their hands full with Petrina Rotchester and Rory Kotch, as all four of them fought their way through the crowd and all the way into the concessions area. Super Vader ordered a pizza, only for Kotch to take her pipe out of the back of her pants and hit him upside the head with it. But with his size, it only dazed him for a bit. Killer Kong barked at a section of fans to clear out of their seats, and thank goodness they obliged as Kong threw Rotchester into the empty chairs as if she were a bowling ball and the chairs were bowling pins. Moxie and Mauler were mixing it up inside the ring, with Moxie taking Mauler down with the New York State of Mind DDT, but only got a two count for his efforts as Mike Hanson knocked Moxie out after hitting him in the back of the head with a steel chair. Meanwhile, at the concessions, Super Vader's pizza that he ordered was finished, and Rory Kotch was about to grab it. Super Vader saw Kotch trying to grab her pizza, which infuriated him. He grabbed Kotch by the head and slammed her face first into the counter, knocking her down into the floor. Super Vader then picked up the pizza and took a big bite. He picked Kotch up and smeared the pizza into her face. Killer Kong and Petrina Rotchester disappeared out into the concourse area on their way to a backstage area as they continued to brawl, while Gambler and Xander Nova brawled their way down the aisle and to the back. Inside the ring, Hanson laughed at Moxie, yelling at him that he was about to beat him in the middle of the ring. However, Hanson could hear the crowd cheering and turned around to see what it was all about. It was too late as Adriana Samu came off the top turnbuckle and nailed Hanson with a flying Tornado Kick off the top turnbuckle, knocking him down and out. She went for the pin, only for Moxie to grab her by the head, throw her out of the ring, then go for the pin himself which elicited a lot of boos from the audience, but also a lot of cheers as he got the one-two-three. "I Can't Wait" came on over the speakers as Moxie slid out of the ring and went to the back, bragging about how he won the match.
Winners: Johnny Moxie and Y Kores
MONICA DELUCA
Here are your winners, the team of Johnny Moxie and Y Kores!
MARK FOLLOWILL
What was supposed to be an eight person tag team match wound up being a Pier Six Brawl.
JASON MARTEL
And what a hard-fought victory for Johnny Moxie!
MARK FOLLOWILL
What are you talking about?! Adriana Samu won that match for her team, only for Moxie to throw her out so he could hog the glory!
JASON MARTEL
I have to say, I think I remember why I liked Johnny Moxie when he was here the first time around.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Well in any event, Moxie and Y Kores get the duke. Now as you all recall, before the match, we saw that Jakob Cross had been beaten up by an unknown assailant. Let's take it to Misty Crawford, who has the latest news on the condition of Jakob Cross.
Shot switches to a backstage hallway, with Misty Crawford standing right outside the medical room door.
MISTY CRAWFORD
Guys, it's not looking good for Mr. Cross as it pertains to him being able to compete anytime soon. I spoke with the doctors, and they said that Cross will have to be taken to a nearby hospital and will stay the night. They also said that his injuries were severe enough to take him out of 4 Up. Needless to say, Gordon Heath and Codi Shane are scrambling to find number sixteen to compete at 4 Up. If we receive any further information, we will be sure to update you with that info as soon as we can.
BROWNWOOD, TEXAS! WE HAVE MORE ETHNICITIES THAN AZLE! |
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Post by Hollywood on May 8, 2010 21:48:11 GMT -6
"Do You Dig Destruction" is playing in the background as we see an advertisement for numerous merchandise items, with text on the screen telling people how to order SNW merchandise either by mail order, by phone or online. The shot then switches to inside the Gordietorium. As "Amazing Disgrace" starts up, we hear the voice of the late, great Johnny Cash:
And I heard, as it were, the noise of thunder,
One of the four beasts saying "Come and see."
And I saw.
And behold, a white horse.
The fans boo their lungs out as out from behind the curtain walks Matt Margera, with his trademark horsehead cane in hand, leading the way as Wench, Tyler Guevara and Andy Lionheart follow behind him.
MONICA DELUCA
The following six person tag match is set for one fall. Introducing first, accompanied to the ring by Matt Margera, the team of Wench, "The New Wave of Extreme" Andy Lionheart, and "The American Lab Rat" Tyler Guevara... the Perfect World!
MARK FOLLOWILL
Folks, this war started innocently enough when Versus Vince defeated Tyler Guevara in a one-on-one match.
JASON MARTEL
Yeah, Tyler Guevara was embarrassed because that little idiot actually believed he got a hard earned victory over Guevara when truth be told, it was the fluke to end all flukes!
MARK FOLLOWILL
Fluke to end all flukes?! Tyler Guevara was never able to get a victory over Versus Vince until Andy Lionheart stuck his nose where it didn't belong in that steel cage match and slammed the cage door over Versus Vince's head!
JASON MARTEL
Meh.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Don't "meh" me!
Matt Margera uses his free hand to put around Wench's shoulder as Tyler and Andy continue to follow them down to the ring. Everyone enters the ring, then Matt Margera walks to one of the corners, climbing up to the middle turnbuckle and holding both of his hands up in the air, holding his horsehead cane in his right hand up in the air as Wench, Tyler and Andy take a knee and bow their heads in reverence to their leader. Everyone stands up as their music dies down. "Whatever" hits, and the crowd comes alive, cheering their lungs out as Versus Vince, Seth Davids and Kijar Donnelly appear from behind the curtain. They begin to walk down the aisle, but stop. Vince turns around to look to the back and waves for someone to come out. Out from behind the curtain walks a very pretty young lady, who Vince takes by the arm.
JASON MARTEL
Now wait just a minute! What right does this woman have to be out here with the Versus Violation?! And who the hell is she?!
MARK FOLLOWILL
First off, that's Versus Vince's girlfriend, Valerie Snyder. And second, she has as much right to be out there for the Versus Violation as Matt Margera has to be out there for the Perfect World.
JASON MARTEL
Actually, she and Vince should be heading home from the prom right about now.
MONICA DELUCA
Their opponents, accompanied to the ring by Valerie Snyder, the team of Versus Vince and the Switch Stallions... ladies and gentlemen, the Versus Violation!
he three run down to the ring, with Valerie at Vince's side. They point to the fans, slapping hands with them and boasting about their accomplishments. On the apron, Vince holds the ropes open for Valerie and allows her to get in. The four of them play to the crowd, each on one corner of the ring as the Perfect World members roll their eyes.
Versus Violation vs Perfect World
This six person tag match wasn't the Pier Six Brawl of the eight person tag match. Rather, it was a great display of speed, technical wrestling ability, and high flying action, with some shenanigans mixed in. But it was still as much out of control as the eight person tag match, as referee Danny Travers didn't even bother keeping track of who was tagging in and out. The match started off with Wench and Kijar Donnelly exchanging holds, counter holds, and any other moves in their arsenal. Wench seemed to have things going her team's way as she came flying off the top turnbuckle, knocking Kijar down with the Whisper in the Wind. Wench, Andy Lionheart, and Tyler Guevara took turns working over Kijar and had things going their for several minutes until Lionheart went for a Diamond Dust, only for Kijar to turn it into an RKO. With both men down and out, Tyler Guevara ran in to try and make a cover on Kijar, only for Versus Vince to run in and nail Guevara with a running dropkick to the head. Vince and Tyler proceeded to go to the outside, brawling with each other on their way to the back as Wench and Seth Davids ran in and put on quite the in-ring display to the amazement of the crowd, pulling out all the stops. However, Wench made what could've been a costly mistake when after whipping Davids into the ropes, she ducked her head down for a back body drop. Davids caught her, underhooked her arms, picked her up and drove her down with the Blade Bomb. He almost had the match won until Matt Margera ran into the ring and nailed Davids over the head with his horsehead cane. Matt continued to pummel Davids with it until Valerie Snyder got up on the ring apron to distract Matt. Matt scolded her, pointing his horsehead cane at her and screaming at her to bow down before him. Valerie just smiled as Matt's distraction led to him getting the Italian Kick to the back of his head, knocking him out. Wench staggered to her feet, only for Kijar to hit her in the back of her head with the Italian Kick. Kijar rolled her over and it was all she wrote.
Winners: Versus Violation
MONICA DELUCA
Here are your winners, the Versus Violation!
JASON MARTEL
What a tainted victory for those pukes!
MARK FOLLOWILL
Not anymore tainted than the victory Matt Margera got last week on Guys Night Out!
JASON MARTEL
Oh bite me!
MARK FOLLOWILL
I'll pass.
Shot statics out, then statics to a pre-recorded shot of Death Sentence standing atop the Gordietorium in the dead of night.
REAPER
Two weeks running, Alley Ratz, we have shown both of you what we are capable of in a one on one situation. To think for one instance that it gets any less destructive when you put us together only makes you look even more brain cell deprived than usual. The fact of the matter is, when we team up, theres nothing on the face of this planet that could compare to the sheer power we have. The only couple of teams in wrestling with similar dominating records were the Road Warriors and the Dud... excuse me, Team 3D. But even saying that, had the opprotunity ever presented itself, Death Sentence would have made both of those teams like curtain jerking rookies. And all you had to say so far is that you're disappointed in yourselves... Funny, I recall saying something similar to Cyanide here and then he blasted you both for it taking out Twitch.
CYANIDE
You see, the problem isn't that you guys aren't good. The problem is that you guys don't apply yourselves 100% of the time. You run around getting high, making jokes, listening to a bunch of clowns rap about stuff they'd never have the balls to ever really do and THEN you think about wrestling. Thats what sets a team like you apart from us. We strive to be the best every time we're in that ring and when the match is over we celebrate for awhile and get back to work training again. You two idiots celebrate about 6 days a week and then show up to wrestle one night and it clearly shows. Hit and miss with you guys. You have all the potential in the world to at least up at our level as a threat, but you'd just rely upon luck. That doesn't work with us. We're not the typical team because we scout our opponents, we know what they want to do and thats how we defend ourselves and ultimately win. You guys will wait for us to make a mistake, but the next thing you'll know, somebody will be trying shovel you out of the ring so the next match can start.
REAPER
People may look at us and think that we're assholes and hell we may even get booed, but I've said this before and now my cousin is starting to realize that when you have a championship, nothing in the world matters except keeping it. If we lose some friends or our fans start to turn on us, thats alright... we will still be the champions and you will still conitnue chasing us.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Death Sentence looks to be ready for the Alley Ratz...
JASON MARTEL
Mark, I hate to interrupt you...
MARK FOLLOWILL
Then why did you just interrupt me?
JASON MARTEL
That's beside the point. Mark, I have received that Robert Evans, Franco D'Angelo, and Myke Rhines all could not make it here tonight.
MARK FOLLOWILL
And that's a big deal because?
JASON MARTEL
Oh come on, Followill! Myke Rhines and Robert Evans are both running for President of SNW, with Franco D'Angelo acting as Robert Evans' VP running mate! How is that not a big deal?!
MARK FOLLOWILL
Well how come they can't make it here tonight?
JASON MARTEL
Well, Franco seems to be suffering from elevated enzymes; Robert seems to be suffering from rickets; and Rhines seems to have contracted scurvy. However, all three WILL be able to make it to 4 Up to let the SNW voters know why they should vote for them in the SNW Presidential Race.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Oh great.
SPORT CLIPS! WHERE GUYS WIN MORE THAN KOKO B. WARE AND CODY PUGH COMBINED! |
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Post by Hollywood on May 8, 2010 21:49:25 GMT -6
Jack Clinton is at ringside as "Enter Sandman" is playing over the PA. He puts on his headset and takes a seat, glaring at Jason Martel, who glares back at him.
MARK FOLLOWILL
We're back with Saturday Night Onslaught, and joining us for commentary is Mr. Balance of Power himself, Jack Clinton.
JASON MARTEL
Why?
JACK CLINTON
Because the man that I'll be facing at 4 Up in a couple weeks is involved in the match and I was asked to do color alongside you guys. You want me to put you through this table again, Martel? Because I won't hesitate and I know Followill won't stop me.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Could you go ahead and do it now?
JASON MARTEL
Don't encourage him, Mark.
"Shitlist" booms over the PA, and the crowd immediately jumps to their feet, booing their lungs out as S.T. Strickler and Benson walk out from behind the curtain and walk down the aisle on their way to the ring. Strickler is as cocky as ever, while Benson is trying to intimidate the ringside fans, but they're having none of it as they flip him the bird and yell many unfortunate obscenities at him.
MONICA DELUCA
The following handicap match is set for one fall. Introducing first, at a combined weight of 462 lbs, the team of Benson and "The Real Deal" S.T. Strickler, the Enforcers of Pain!
MARK FOLLOWILL
After a big win last week on Guys Night Out against Levetation and Syco Boy, the Enforcers of Pain issued a challenge to Bad Blood and Texas Heavyweight Champion, Chris Angel.
JASON MARTEL
And Jack, even you have to admit that Angel is stupid for taking a match like this so close to him having to defend the Texas Heavyweight Championship against you at 4 Up.
JACK CLINTON
If this is what he wants to do, then I'm not gonna knock him for it. He knows what he's doing- that's why he's the top dog for the moment. Operative words, of course.
Strickler and Benson walk around ringside, glaring down at Clinton, who just glares right back at them. The Enforcers of Pain enter the ring, with Strickler pointing to himself, reminding everyone he's "The Real Deal" while Benson takes off his coat and tie as "Shitlist" dies down. "Stranglehold" hits, and the crowd cheers their heads off as Chris Angel, holding the Bad Blood Title on his left shoulder and the Texas Heavyweight Title on his right shoulder, makes his way down to the ring, all smiles.
MONICA DELUCA
Their opponent, from Los Angeles, California by way of Dallas, Texas and weighing 280 lbs... the SNW Bad Blood and Texas Heavyweight Champion... "The Dream" Chris Angel!
MARK FOLLOWILL
The top dog in SNW doesn't seem to have much trepidation going into this match.
JASON MARTEL
I always knew Chris Angel had more guts than brains.
JACK CLINTON
You wanna talk about a lack of brains, look across the ring. Or better yet, look at the guy who's actually being paid to be the color guy and how he's being outshined by me in that job.
Chris Angel vs Enforcers of Pain
Benson and Strickler went after Angel as soon as he got into the ring, hitting him with everything they had. They had him staggering after they whipped him into the corner, followed up by Strickler running and hitting a Stinger Splash, and Benson running and hitting Angel with an Avalanche. The Enforcers of Pain continued to work over Angel until they attempted the Hart Attack. As Strickler was running the ropes and Benson was holding Angel in the bearhug, Angel brought Benson down with a DDT, then popped up and knocked Strickler down with a hard clothesline. Angel went to work on Strickler, only for the numbers game to catch up to Angel after Benson caught him with a clothesline from behind. The Enforcers of Pain continued to try to work over Chris Angel, but Angel kept fighting back. The end came when Benson and Strickler went for a double clothesline, but Angel ducked, grabbed them by the heads and banged them together with a double noggin knocker. Angel took Strickler down with a Facebuster, then mustered all the strength he had to hit Benson with the Fallen, gaining the pinfall victory.
Winner: Chris Angel
MONICA DELUCA
Here is your winner of the match, the SNW Bad Blood and Texas Champion Chris Angel!
MARK FOLLOWILL
Well another solid win for the dual champion tonight, as he is rolling hot into 4 Up with this victory.
JASON MARTEL
Don't feel so sure about yourself now huh Clinton?
JACK CLINTON
Shut up Martel, you've got less on the microphone than the love child of Bruce Bowen and Lance Storm so shut your piehole. In regard to my 4 Up opponent, he looked great tonight, and I fully expect a stout challenge come May 22nd.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Well thank you Jack for joining us here at ringside, and until 4 Up...wait a minute what's going on in the ring?
As Angel was getting his title belts and getting ready to leave, Strickler and Benson pounced on him. They started landing blunt punches and kicks, sending Angel to the ground and into the turnbuckle. Angel tried to fight them off, but it was too much as the double team was overwhelming him. Clinton threw his headset off and quickly got into the ring, and evened the score to the adulation of the crowd. He was able to rip Benson off and hit him with a big boot causing Benson to hit the mat and roll out of the ring. Clinton then grabbed Strickler, hoisted him over his head, and threw him over the ropes onto his ally. Clinton exited the ring, and started battling the two back up the aisle and into the backstage area. Angel stood up slowly, looking extremely glad to be saved.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Well that almost ended badly for the champ, but good thing his friend Jack Clinton was here to offer him some support.
JASON MARTEL
Mark, why don't you look in the crowd for a moment.
MARK FOLLOWILL
What am I looking for?
JASON MARTEL
I think Clinton might have left a bit too early.
Pouring through the crowd were all the not-so-popular competitors for 4 Up, such as Wench, James Jackson, Tyler Straven, Chase Daniels, Tyler Guevara, Danny Palis, and Andy Lionheart. They streaked down and ran into the ring, and began to beat down Angel themselves. Angel stood no chance, as the fans booed the assault on him as they all tried to get their licks in. All of a sudden, though, the lights went out in the entire Gordietorium.
MARK FOLLOWILL
Everything is going wrong now! Angel is getting mercilessly beaten by the wrestlers who want that Bad Blood Title, and now the lights have gone out!
JASON MARTEL
What could possibly be next?!
All of a sudden, "This Fire Burns" screams over the sound system of the Gordietorium. It plays for a moment, then the lights come back on. In the ring is Vincent Matthews, wielding a steel chair. He is trying to fight off all the 4 Up contestants. He smashes Tyler Guevara in the head with the chair, slams it into the side of Chase Daniels, then nails Wench in the knee with it. Half of the attackers try to take out Matthews, but he uses the chair and keeps sending them down one by one as the fans are cheering the save by Matthews. Angel has somehow rebounded from the attacks he has suffered, and has been able to fight off the rest of the assailants. Angels and Matthews are left standing in the ring. The two men exchange looks for a moment, and they exchange a brief handshake as the fans chant "THANK YOU MATTHEWS!" Angel turns around and grabs both of his title belts from ringside, and as he turns around to leave Matthews swings the chair and lands it square on the head of Angel. Angel staggers then falls face first onto the mat, unconscious as the fans start to boo Matthews heavily once again.
MARK FOLLOWILL
What a sorry sack of crap! Vincent Matthews makes his return to SNW tonight, looking like he was going to save Chris Angel from the beat down he was receiving. However, it was all a smokescreen to get Angel all to himself.
JASON MARTEL
What a brilliant move by Vincent Matthews! Talk about sending a message!
MARK FOLLOWILL
Well he's getting a microphone, let's see if he can explain himself.
Matthews goes and gets a microphone from ringside. He walks over to the laid out Angel, and bends down talking almost directly to him.
VINCENT MATTHEWS
You didn't expect me to be away forever did you Angel? No, no I was going to be back. I just had to wait for the right moment, and I found it tonight. But I'm not just talking about the attack on you. You know Jakob Cross, and Sean Hall, Chris? Who do you think was behind that? Who did you think brought those two inferior talents down to size? But I want you to pay close attention, Angel, because we are going to be seeing each other very soon. The next time you will see me, you will be handing me the Bad Blood Championship after I walk out from the Cage of Death as the victor. Say hello to number sixteen, and the next winner of 4 Up!
Matthews drops the microphone hollowly, and picks up both the Bad Blood and Texas Championship belts. He holds them over his head as the fans boo him with genuine hatred. He drops them over Angels' back, as the show comes to a close with Matthews staring down at the prone Angel.
2010 EXACTLY I MEAN PRODUCTIONS |
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